All right; so those weren't Oscar Wilde's last words - but they should have been We'll start the day by mentioning three of the wittiest men who ever lived. It's the birthday of both Jonathan Swift (b. 1667) and Mark Twain (b. 1835), and the anniversary of the death in 1900 of Oscar Wilde. Swift was the Irish cleric and satirist who wrote "A Modest Proposal" (which purportedly advocated that the cure for Irish economic woes was selling its children to be eaten) and "Gulliver's Travels" (which started out as a satire of European politics, but has evolved to become fodder for Jack Black to show once again how annoyingly unfunny he is). We've written about Twain in previous Sparks, but we’ll add once again that his "Adventures of Huckleberry Finn" is considered by many to be the "Great American Novel," and that his autobiography was published a couple of weeks ago. Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde was one of Ireland and England's most celebrated wits, with an epigram for every occasion. He wrote plays, books, and poems, including one of the most perfect comedies ever, "The Importance of Being Earnest." In 1895, at the height of his fame, he was arrested and tried for his homosexuality, and eventually sentenced to two years of hard labor. A broken man by the time he was released in 1897, he left London, ending his days in a  shabby Parisian hotel. On a less gloomy Gallic note, we note that on this day in 1886, the Folies Bergère staged its first revue. The theatre was dedicated to music hall and vaudeville-type performances, and in its time has featured such stars as Charlie Chaplin, W.C. Fields, Elton John, Ella Fitzgerald, Frank Sinatra, and even Benny Hill. If you're looking for racier entertainment, we can point you to a double shot today, as CBS will air the annual "Victoria's Secret Fashion Show," and the 2011 Pirelli calendar will be released. The TV show, a parade of beautiful women walking the runway in their underwear is a beloved holiday tradition for men (and lingerie-loving women) everywhere, while the Pirelli calendar offers many of the same models, only sans the underwear, in artistic photos. (We'd offer more links to the calendar, but this is a family-friendly blog, after all.) We're so family-friendly, that we'll offer some programming to counter the fashion show. Tonight also brings the annual airing of the stop-motion animated classic, "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" and NBC's special "Christmas in Rockefeller Center," which will feature appearances by Susan Boyle, Mariah Carey, Sheryl Crow, Jackie Evancho, Josh Groban, Annie Lennox, Kylie Minogue, and Jessica Simpson The extravaganza will climax with the lighting of the Center's tree (this year, it's a 74-foot Norway spruce from Mahopac, New York). The weather forecast for New York on Tuesday evening calls for rain and a low of 53°F, not exactly winter weather, so we guess it's appropriate that the U.N.'s Climate Change Conference is being held this week in sunny Cancun, Mexico (Tuesday's forecast high: 82°F). Speaking of "hot," Tuesday is the 28th anniversary of the release of Michael Jackson's "Thriller," which became the biggest-selling album of all time, in addition to inspiring prisoners around the globe to replicate Jacko's signature moves. As unique as Michael Jackson in their own ways were Winston Churchill and Irma S. Rombauer. Churchill was the Nobel Prize-winning author, historian, orator, and two-time British Prime Minister who led his country through World War II (and was promptly bounced out of office afterward as thanks) and whose 136th birthday occurs today. Rombauer was the St. Louis teacher and housewife whose cooking classes were so popular that, on this day in 1931, she self-published her book of recipes under the title "The Joy of Cooking." The book has never been out of print, and although it has undergone numerous revisions and alterations in the decades since, it remains one of America's favorite cookbooks. Finally, we remind you that today is Computer Security Day, so take a moment to check your security settings and virus updates, won't you? We want to see you back safely next time. Suggested Sites... After Reading: Prison, Publication, and Personal Letters - letters to and from Oscar Wilde after his release from prison. Folies Bergere Stages First Revue - a show featuring "scantily clad chorus girls" was "a tremendous success." Boy, times sure have changed ... CBS: Victoria's Secret Fashion Show - ... yep, they sure have. Wikipedia: Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Special - is it Hermie the Elf, or Herbie? About.com: Computer Safety Tips - stay virtually safe.

Directory categories: Authors, Playwrights, Paris, Rockefeller Center, Cookbooks

Archived under: 17th Century, 1930s, 19th Century, Actors, American History, Animation, Anniversaries, Authors, Beauty, Birthdays, Books, Bras, Breasts, Buildings, Calendars, Celebrations, Celebrities, Charlie Chaplin, Christmas, Clothing and Accessories, Coincidence, Computers, Cooking, Dead Celebrities, Death, Eating, Entertainment, Environment, Events, Fiction, Food and Drink, France, Frank Sinatra, Gay History, History, Holidays, Humor, In Character, Legal Cases, Lingerie, Literature, London, Mark Twain, Men, Michael Jackson, Models, Movies, Music, Musicians, New York, Oscar Wilde, Performing Arts, Photography, Quotes, Recipes, Safety, Scandals, Science, Sex and Sexuality, Singers, TV, Theatres, Thriller, Tourist Attractions, Trees, U.K. History, United Kingdom, United Nations, Vaudeville, WWII, Weather, Winter, Women, Writers, Writing

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Napoleon in happier (and warmer) times Traditionally in warfare, if one army of nearly 700,000 men is facing another army of less than 190,000, you’d bet on the larger force to win. However, if the 690,000 men are Napoleon's French Army invading Russia and it's winter, then the smart money wil smartly swap sides to the Russian home team. Why? Well, consider the ill-fated 1812 invasion attempt by Napoleon Bonaparte. (It's a lesson Adolph Hitler could have learned from when he launched his ill-fated Operation Barbarossa in 1941.) On June 23rd, 1812, Napoleon's Grande Armée, an awesome 690,000-man strong war machine, strode into Russia. The Grande Armée had previously conquered most of Continental Europe, so it was thought that the Russian invasion would be very similar: a bit bigger, perhaps, but one following the same basic tactics. Napoleon had won his previous battles by quickly massing as many men as possible against his enemies and overwhelming them. So it came as no surprise when his master plan to defeat the Russians -- a country of six and a half million square miles -- within 20 days, mind you, involved, yes, quickly massing as many men as possible, forcing the Russian armies to fight him and -- you guessed it -- destroying them through superior numbers. However, for this technique to work, his armies had to move fast -- just as they had in his European battles. But this was Russia: the roads were poor and the surrounding countryside even poorer; a detail that became crucial because Napoleon's tactics also involved having his men live off the land (or "pillage," depending upon which side you were on). If the war had finished on schedule, this wouldn't have been a problem; it became a problem only when the Russian army steadfastly refused to play by the rules and fight the Grand Armée. Instead they just kept retreating. And retreating. And retreating. As their pursuit of the retreating Russians dragged on, hunger and disease began to ravage the Grand Armée. By the time it reached Moscow some three months later, a third of its numbers were already dead or sick. Napoleon hadn't planned to attack Moscow -- his original plan had been a quick battle and the destruction of the Russian Army; it was only the perpetual retreat of the Russians the had sucked the Armée so deep into such very hostile territory. In September 1812, the now not-so-Grand Armée finally staggered into a deserted Moscow that had been stripped of all useful supplie. The exhausted and angry French had such a fit of Gallic pique that they burned the city to the ground. With no shelter, no food, and facing a possible Russian attack (at last!), Napoleon was forced to abandon the city and retreat. But all of the difficulties which had inconvenienced Napoleon's troops on the way to Moscow combined with the bitterly-cold Russian winter and began to kill them on the long march home. By the time they reached the French border, more than half a million troops had died.   So as any military historian will tell you, the first rule of war in Europe? "Don't invade Russia in the winter!" Suggested Sites... Napoleon Who? - the life and times of a small but ambitious man. Military History Online - Soldiers of Fortitude: The Grande Armee of 1812 in Russia. A Short Russian Military History - (just don't mention the winters!) Wikipedia: 1812 Overture - and you thought it was just about cannons going off. Montgomery's Rules of War - Rule 1, on page 1 of the book of war...

Directory categories: Napoléon Bonaparte, Napoleonic Wars, Russia, Operation Barbarossa

Archived under: 19th Century, Anniversaries, Europe, European History, France, History, Military, Moscow, Napoleon Bonaparte, Russia, War, Winter

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In Vienna, curling may be for the terminally hip, but everywhere else, it's for everyone (Photo by Chad K) Way back in 2002, I was up late one night during the Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. In a mood to watch the competition, I happened upon a curling match. "Curling?!," I scoffed, "Surely there's something better than that." I stayed tuned, though. There was something about the sport that was gripping, what with its arcane rules, fast-yet-slow action, and alien aspects. I was hooked, and I’ve stayed that way ever since. In 2006, I wrote the piece below, in anticipation of the Turin Olympic Games. In those years since, popular culture has caught up with The Spark. It might be human to feel superior to these Johnny-come-latelys -- I mean, when "The Simpsons" has built an episode around a cultural phenomenon, surely its time has passed -- but in the spirit of curlers around the world, I can't help but feel fellowship with anyone who gets -- and loves -- a bonspiel of any kind, anywhere. One winter's day in the dim past, someone saw that a lake or a river that had frozen over and said to his fellows, "Hey, let's find some heavy rocks, go out on the ice and slide them at a target." From those humble beginnings grew curling, the world's most exciting slow-motion sport. It’s a pastime available to curlers of all ages -- from eight to eighty -- who love nothing better than to find a rink and get a bonspiel going. They lace up their sliders, step up to the hack, and slide a series of 41-pound chunks of polished granite (the "stones") down the ice at a target called "the house." There's more to curling than just sliding rocks, though -- team members (the not-so-cleverly named "lead," "second," "third," and "skip") also get to scrub the ice with brooms! Since the ice the game is played on is deliberately made uneven and stippled by pouring hot water on it -- unlike the glassy surfaces speed skaters, hockey players, and figure skaters perform on -- curlers have to use their brooms to make sure that the stone speeds up, slows down, and goes (or "curls") where they want it -- until the skip shouts "off!" The team that ends the game with the most stones after ten ends (not unlike baseball innings) close to the target -- the "button" at the center of the house (think of it as a bulls-eye in darts) -- wins. If a team somehow manages to get all of its own rocks -- and none of their opponents' -- in the house, though, they score that rarest of feats, an 8-ender -- comparable to a 300 game in bowling. For those with a taste for freezing, wearing funny clothes, and trying not to fall, it's heaven on ice. Suggested Sites... World Curling Federation - source for bonspiels around the globe. Vancouver Olympics: Curling - schedules, news, and highlights. NBC Olympics: Curling - schedules, video highlights, and expert commentary. CBC: Olympic Curling - standings, features, rules, and history. Curling Science - it's more than just shuffleboard on ice.

Directory categories: Curling, Curling at the 2010 Olympic Games , 2010 Olympic Games, Winter Sports, Curling Gear and Equipment

Archived under: Canada, Curling, Games, Ice, Olympics, Sports, Winter, Winter Olympics, Winter Sports, Women's Sports

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The Olympic Flame -- rendered in snow (Photo by Tim Gillin) It's time to break out the axes and chisels: snow sculpture season has officially begun! I'm one of those people who considers it a major accomplishment if I'm able to somehow stack three balls of snow so that they vaguely resemble a snowman, so I'm in complete awe of what goes on at the world's various snow-carving events. Teams of snow sculptors flock from around the globe to snow-sculpting competitions and create some amazing and complex pieces -- with tragically short life spans. The most well-known of these events are Zehnders of Frankenmuth in Michigan and the Budweiser International Snow Sculpture Championships in Breckenridge, Colorado. But there are also smaller, local festivals, including the GCI Snow Sculpture Competition in Alaska, the Idaho Snow Sculpting Festival in McCall, Snow Days in Chicago, and the Illinois Snow Sculpting Competition in Rockford. While Zehnders features ice carving as well, most of these local competitions seem to focus solely on snow sculpture. The size and artistry of these sculptures makes the competitions great family attractions and media events. And, as a bonus, there's generally an opportunity to see how these works of art are made, since they are, of necessity, built on-site. Of course, this shouldn't take all the fun out of making your own lowly snowman or other amateur snow art, nor should ambitious ice swans prevent anyone from having fun building with ice. So go out and play! Suggested Sites... The Ice Hotel - hotel in Lapland for people who reeeeally like ice. The Ten Thumbs Guide to Snow Sculpting - a snow sculptor explains his work. St. Paul Winter Carnival - one of the oldest winter carnivals in the world. Michigan Tech Winter Carnival - carrying on the snow statue tradition since 1922. National Ice Carving Association - note to amateur ice carvers: consult these folks before you pick up the chainsaw.

Directory categories: Ice and Snow Sculpture, Ice and Snow Sculpting Events, Ice Sculpting Supplies and Services, Winter Festivals, Winter

Archived under: Arts, Contests, Crafts, Design, Festivals, Ice, Outdoors, Recreation and Travel, Snow, Tourist Attractions, Winter

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Getting her tongue stuck to a pole is the least of her concerns. (Photo by Patrick) It's winter, and the sun has shifted away from the Northern Hemisphere, making the days shorter and the weather colder. It's the perfect temperature for snuggling by a fire, bundling up warmly to venture out ice skating, or donning a bathing suit and jumping into a 45°F lake. Wait, what? That's right, January 1st, 2010 will mark Canada's 90th annual Polar Bear Swim, where lunatics (a.k.a. hardcore devotees to charity) jump into a freezing lake with nothing but of bit of spandex to protect them from them elements. Polar Bear Clubs are an offshoot of the equally crazy sport of ice swimming, where a hole is cut into the ice so swimmers can jump into the freezing waters hiding just beneath. Ice swimmers tout the sport's health and spiritual benefits -- but a little vodka to warm the bones doesn't hurt either. Of course, if you'd rather keep your clothes on while you enjoy the extreme cold, there's the North Pole Marathon where runners race 26.2 miles across Arctic ice floes in sub-zero temperatures. Or try the slightly less insane sport of ice biking, where cyclists refuse to acknowledge that the combination of a frozen road and a thirty pound bike frame is probably not a good mix. And if water sports are more your forte, snowkiting takes the sport of kiteboarding from the ocean to the snow. Snowkiters use skis or a snowboard to glide across the snow with the assistance of a foil or inflatable kite, but unlike kiteboarding, snowkiters have the added thrill of dodging trees and other inanimate objects as they sail across the snowy plains. Sooner or later, some hearty soul is going to invent blizzard parasailing. When that happens, I'll wish them well... then bundle down under my down comforter with a cup of hot apple cider. They're nuts. Suggested Sites... Polar Bear Swim 2010 - Vancouver - site for the 90th Polar Bear Swim in Vancouver Polar Bear Swim 2010 - Toronto - site for the 90th Polar Bear Swim in Toronto. Plungapalooza - the annual Polar Bear Plunge in Baltimore, Maryland. Snowkiting - pictures, videos, tips, and more. Icebike - pictures, stories, equipment recommendations, etc.

Directory categories: Polar Bear Clubs, Winter Swimming, Winter Cycling, Winter Sports, Extreme Sports

Archived under: Adventure, Athletes, Biking, Canada, Events, Extreme Sports, Fanatics, Ice, Marathons, Running, Skiing, Snow, Sports, Swimming, Weather, Winter, Winter Sports

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