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Monster Turkeys and Giant Balloons
By Dave Sikula
Tue, November 23, 2010, 12:01 am PST

Brois Karloff as Frankenstein's monster
"Turkey good! Football good!
Lip-synching in Macy's Parade bad!"
There's lots to say about arts and entertainment over the next few days. Let's start at the top, with Boris Karloff, born November 23, 1887 . The erstwhile William Henry Pratt labored as a truck driver, farmhand, and occasional character actor until 1931, when he landed the role of the monster in "Frankenstein." Even though he went unbilled in the original release of the movie, he became an instant star whose name was linked with horror until his death in 1969. In a nice coincidence, Forrest J. Ackerman, the man who became one of Karloff's best friends and biggest boosters was born a day later (albeit in 1916). Ackerman was the longtime editor of "Famous Monsters of Filmland" magazine, and cultivated a love for monsters and psychological horror in a million youngsters in the 1950s and '60s.

But we've only scratched the surface when it comes to entertainment. For example, in 1889, the first jukebox went into operation at the Palais Royale Saloon in San Francisco. (We'll add that "juke" was slang for ... well, a "house of ill repute," and leave it at that.) This distant ancestor to the iPod contained a tinfoil phonograph with four listening tubes and a coin slot for each tube. So popular was it that it took in $1,000 in the first six months - a nickel at a time. Musical entertainment has evolved significantly in the century since. On Wednesday, we'll note the 142nd birthday of composer Scott Joplin. Joplin didn't invent ragtime music, but was one of its foremost composers, his "Maple Leaf Rag" virtually defined the era.

Joplin isn't the only great artist who's an exemplar of his chosen genre. On Wednesday evening, PBS will broadcast an all-star concert celebrating the 80th birthday of Stephen Sondheim, composer and lyricist for some of the best - and most important - musicals in theatre history. And on November 25, 1949, Robert May and Johnny Marks'  "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" made its debut/ Gene Autry's recording of the tune eventually sold more than 25 million records.

If those are the heights musical genres can reach, we note what some might consider the nadir, represented by tonight's episodes of "Glee" (featuring Carol Burnett) and the (tainted?) finale of "Dancing with the Stars." (And we mention the 1871 founding of the National Rifle Association purely in passing here - in case someone wants to emulate Steven Cowan.)

Music can have an effect even in the world of science. Wednesday is the 36th anniversary of Donald Johanson and Tom Gray's discovery of the Australopithecus afarensis skeleton that they named "Lucy," after the Beatles song "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds."

The fine arts are also represented this week. Tuesday is the 118th birthday of Romain de Tirtoff, who, under the name Erté (taken from the French pronunciation of his initials) virtually defined the Art Deco style of the early 20th century, and Wednesday is the 146th birthday of French illustrator Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec. Toulouse-Lautrec captured the lives of the Parisian demimonde of the late 19th century. And while it's not exactly "art," the first issue of "Life" magazine was published in 1936. Over the next 36 years, the photojournalism magazine featured some of the finest photography in the world - though none of its photographers could have used a zoom lens until it was invented this week in 1948.

In performing arts, Agatha Christie's murder-mystery play "The Mousetrap" opened in London's West End in 1952, and has been running ever since, making it the longest continuously-running play in history. (There was even a recent controversy over whether the surprise ending should be revealed on Wikipedia. It was, so if you go over there, consider yourself warned.). Pity movie producer John Woolf, who bought the movie rights to the play, on the condition that he not film it until it closed. Woolf died in 1999, but the play runs on. It sounds like a disaster almost profound enough to be filmed by producer Irwin Allen, king of such disaster movies as "The Poseidon Adventure" and "The Towering Inferno," and whose 94th birthday would have been Wednesday. It could be a disaster, but not a cosmic mystery suitable for solving by Doctor Who, the venerable BBC television series that began broadcasting this week in 1963.

Crime and criminals also figure into this week (like every week, probably). On November 24, 1971, D.B. Cooper skyjacked a Boeing 727, collected $200,000 in ransom, and parachuted out over southern Washington state, never to be seen again.

We mention an odd birthday coincidence in passing. Wednesday is the 122nd birthday of motivational author Dale Carnegie, and Thursday is the 175th birthday of industrialist and philanthropist Andrew Carnegie. Dale (whose last name was originally spelled "Carnagey") wrote the book "How to Win Friends and Influence People" (which is still a best-seller on the self-help charts, nearly 75 years after it was published). Andrew made his fortune in the steel business and ended up giving most of it away, endowing libraries, schools, universities, along with numerous charities and foundations. By 1919, he had given away over $350 million (about $4.3 billion in 2010 dollars), with the remaining $30 million distributed after his death that year.

In animal events, President Obama is scheduled to give an executive pardon to a turkey on Wednesday, and Thursday (in addition to everything else) is the National Dog Show in Philadelphia.

Lastly, we mention what is, for many, the most notable event of the week: Thanksgiving, with its attendant gorging, football. T-Day also brings us the Macy's Parade, which gives television viewers across the country the chance to watch b-list actors and singers lip synch to lousy music, and this year will feature such traditional holiday entertainers as Jessica Simpson, Jimmy Fallon and the Roots, and Kanye West. Truly a Thanksgiving smorgasbord!

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Goodnight, Nessie
By Dave Sikula
Fri, November 12, 2010, 12:01 am PST

The Loch Ness Monster
Goodnight to the creature
who swims in the lake.
Goodnight to the killjoys
who think she's a fake.
Thursday, we noted the anniversary of Route 66, and until the federal government decommissioned it, the various highway departments in the states through which the road ran kept it in good shape. Not every such department is as fastidious, though. For example, there's the Oregon Highway Division, which on November 12, 1970, decided that the best way to destroy a rotting sperm whale that had beached itself before dying was to blow it up, an incident which led to one the greatest memes in Internet history: "the exploding whale."

While the whale parts made for a gloppy, smelly mess, the resulting patterns might well have resembled a masterpiece by Sunday's birthday boy, Claude Monet. Born in 1840, Monet was part of the revolutionary school of painting (taking its name - "Impressionism" – from of one of Monet's pictures) that was notable for depicting the effects of light on objects and places and making unique personal statements through their canvases.

Friday must be a day for creatures. In 1933, Hugh Gray took the first known photos of the Loch Ness Monster in Scotland. While some deny the existence of "Nessie," we are convinced she is alive and well.

Not so benign a creature was Joseph McCarthy, the senator who took paranoia, ignorance, and character assassination to new heights. Sunday would have marked his 102nd birthday. McCarthy was, by all accounts, an unpleasant man, and through his unceasing attempts to smear anyone who opposed him as a Communist, he managed to give his name to both an era and a political tactic. Censured by the Senate in 1954 for his actions, he eventually drank himself to death in 1957.

Almost as unpleasant as Sen. McCarthy is Yanni, the New Age musician whose calming tunes are as soporific as the situation comedies of Sherwood Schwartz. Both men celebrate their birthdays on Sunday, so perhaps Mr. Schwartz (responsible for such sitcoms as The Brady Bunch" and "Gilligan's Island") and Mr. Hrysomallis (Yanni's real name) will spend the night before their 94th and 56th birthdays, respectively, watching something more energetic, like UFC 122. (The idea of Yanni screaming himself hoarse over wrestlers is pretty delicious.)

Of course, it's possible that the men might celebrate with a trip, though we wouldn't suggest one as energetic as that begun on November 14, 1889, when pioneering female journalist Nellie Bly (aka Elizabeth Cochrane) began her successful attempt to travel around the world in fewer than 80 days, in emulation of Jules Verne's Phileas Fogg. Nellie completed the trip in a mere 72 days. An appropriate feat this week especially, as National Geography Awareness Week begins on Sunday.

Newspapers around the world covered Nellie's trip, but the BBC couldn't have - because it didn't exist. The venerable network begin its radio service in 1922, some 33 years after her voyage. They've made up for it in the decades since with continuous news and entertainment.

One of the stories we're sure they covered was the marriage of actress Carmen Electra and basketball player Dennis Rodman, wed in Las Vegas (where else?) in 1998. Unfortunately, the happy couple couldn't make a go of it, and they were divorced four-and-a-half months later.

Something else that couldn't last (in spite of surviving about 500 years) was the Inca Empire, which saw the beginning of its end in 1533, when Francisco Pizarro's Spanish conquistadors arrived in Cajamarca, Peru, to show the natives who the new bosses were - a feat not unlike that performed by single women upon single men on Sadie Hawkins Day, which debuted in Al Capp's comic strip, "Li'l Abner" in 1937. Sadie Hawkins was the "homeliest gal" in Abner's hometown of Dogpatch. When she turned 35, her father declared that there would be a race with all the town's unmarried men being pursued by its unamrried women. Any bachelor who was caught was doomed to matrimony.

We end the week by noting that Saturday is World Kindness Day, and noting the 1952 death of a woman who must have been one of the kindest people ever: Margaret Wise Brown. Brown was a writer of children's books, who, in collaboration with such artists as Clement Hurd, turned out such classics as "Goodnight, Moon" and "The Runaway Bunny," which have calmed and enriched the bedtimes of millions of children.

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World's Largest Drag Queen Goes Over Falls with Pumpkin Pie
By Dave Sikula
Mon, October 18, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Matisse's
Upside down? Right-side up?
Beats the hell out of us
It's quiet this week. As we look over our files, we see little of consequence. We assume folks are still getting into an autumnal mood, but we persevere and submit herewith our own events and commemorations of the week.

Monday:

We begin the week by noting it's a big one for Thomas Edison. On this date in 1878, his company made electricity available for household usage. In 1931, on this day, he died, and Thursday marks the 131st anniversary of the demonstration of his first light bulb at his laboratory in Menlo Park, New Jersey, now known as "Edison."

It's a notable week for other inventions, too. For example, in 1954, Texas Instruments introduced the transistor radio. Up until the '50s, radios were big bulky things, full of vacuum tubes and wires. With the invention of the transistor in 1947, it was suddenly possible to make radios, televisions, and pretty much anything electronic small and portable. The transistor radio came along just in time for post-war teenagers to carry rock and roll music anywhere, driving their parents and other adults crazy. And Friday will mark the anniversary of the creation of the first Xerox image in 1938. Before then, people actually had to write or type things on a sheet of paper to duplicate them. Now, plagiarism is only the push of a button away.

Speaking of "crazy," "The Talk" debuts on CBS today, featuring Sara Gilbert, Sharon Osbourne, Leah Remini, Julie Chen, Holly Robinson Peete, and Marissa Jaret Winokur in a show that's absolutely nothing like "The View." (We mention that it's also World Menopause Day - completely in passing ...)

While we've mentioned science, let's not forget art. In 1896, the world's first comic strip, "The Yellow Kid," debuted. It wasn't so much a "strip" as a daily cartoon featuring something outlandish in society that the otherwise-mute Kid would comment on with writing on his nighshirt. What he would have had to say about Henri Matisse's "Le Bateau," we can only imagine. It went on display at New York's Museum of Modern Art on this day in 1961 - and it wasn’t until 116, 000 viewers and 47 days had passed that someone noticed that the painting had been hanging upside down.

We finish by noting it's Alaska Day, commemorating the transfer of Alaska from Russia to the United States in 1867. (No jokes about seeing Russia from your house, please ...)

Tuesday:

Only two events of note today. One is the 1745 death of Jonathan Swift, the cleric, novelist, and satirist who gave us "Gulliver's Travels" (whence originated our corporate name) and "A Modest Proposal." One is tempted to hope he was eaten by cannibals, but, alas, he met his end via a stroke.

In 1945, Harris Glen Milstead was born in Baltimore. Glenn led an ordinary life until he met aspiring filmmaker John Waters, who cast him as "The Smoking Nun" in his film "Roman Candles," renaming him "Divine," the name he used the rest of his life. Divine was described by "People" magazine as the "Drag Queen of the Century" (though was there that much competition?) and spent the rest of his career going from one outlandish role to another in Waters' films before his untimely death at the age of 42.

Wednesday:

We have three seasonal events today that are absolutely appropriately for this time of year. In 1967, Roger Patterson and Robert Gimlin, took out their home-movie camera, photographed a guy in a gorilla suit, and claimed they’d filmed a Bigfoot. The veracity of the footage has been the subject of debate ever since, though we're prepared to say it's a fake.

In the otherwise-sleepy hamlet of Circleville, Ohio, the annual Circleville Pumpkin Show will begin its four-day run today. Since 1903, the festival has presented thousands of these flavorful squashes to an adoring public who come for the sculpting, bands, and beauty contests, but who stay for the World’s Largest Pumpkin Pie, baked fresh every year by Lindsey’s Bake Shop.

In 1882, Bela Blasko was born in Lugos, Romania. At 12, the stage-struck Bela dropped out of school, became an actor, and changed his last name to Lugosi. As Bela Lugosi, he was a matinee idol in his own country, before coming to America in 1921. He worked as a laborer and occasional actor until 1927, when his continental good looks and accent made him a natural for the title role in the Broadway production of “Dracula." While the play was a smash hit, and led to a Hollywood contract, his accent baffled casting directors, who could see him only as a romantic vampire, and he was soon type-cast in horror films. Despite some occasional “straight” roles (most notably in 1938’s "Ninotchka," his career quickly headed to not-very-good parts in B-pictures, usually parodying his image. He always gave his utmost, even when the material was sub-par, as in his final films with Ed Wood, Hollywood’s worst director. He died of a heart attack in 1956.

Thursday:

More unrelated (but still interesting) events for the day:

In 1849, the first tattooed man to be put on public exhibit, James F. O’Connel, was put on display at the Franklin Theatre in New York City. Not sure what more can be added to that.

Except perhaps noting that today is Reptile Awareness Day, so we encourage you to go out and be aware of some reptiles -- perhaps while enjoying a big plate of nachos, since it’s also the International Day of the Nacho.

Friday:

When we compile these lists, we’re overwhelmed with celebrations of "National This Day" and "International That Week," so imagine our surprise and disappointment when we discovered that one of our sources lists October 22 with this note: “There are no holiday events on record for this day,” Is it possible that only one day out of 365 is bereft of some kind of celebration? It may be true, though (alas!), as the only other events of note we could find are the 107th birthday of Stooge Jerome "Curly" Howard, and the fact that it’s International Stuttering Awareness Day.

Curly is probably the most popular of all the Stooges, combining a unique physical and vocal style into a characterization that was breathtakingly bold in the 1930s and has been a boon to adolescent boys (of all ages) in the decades since.

Saturday:

Looking for something fun to do today? We have three suggestions.

1) Celebrate the 80th anniversary of the world’s first miniature golf tournament in Chattanooga, Tennessee. The tournament was won by J.K. Scott, though the record neglects to state whether he was better shooting through the windmill or the castle.

2) If you’re near Oklahoma City, you might join the Ghouls Gone Wild celebration headlined by The Flaming Lips and participate in their annual March of 1000 Flaming Skeletons. Be warned, though, you’ve got to handle a live torch - and those costumes can be flammable.

3) You can celebrate Mole Day. The “Mole” is a method of counting the Avogadro number - 6.02 x 10 to the 23rd power of anything. Amodeo Avogadro discovered that the number of molecules in a mole is the same for all substances, which allows chemists are able to precisely measure quantities of chemicals in the lab. Mole Day is intended to help everyone become enthusiastic about chemistry. If you understood a word of that, the first two events may be too strenuous for you, so our advice is to stick with the chemistry.

Sunday:

To finish off the week, we’ll note the near-irony of it being the Feast of Good & Plenty, because yes, we had a number of good events this week, but not plenty of them.

It’s also World Origami Day, which somehow runs through November 11 (must be that those origami artists are able to fold time and space, as well as paper).

Speaking of folding, we also have to mention that, on this day in 1901, Annie Edson Taylor became the first person to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel. How she didn’t end up folded herself is one of the miracles of the age - especially considering she did it to celebrate her 63rd birthday. She’d sent her cat over the falls in her specially-padded barrel the day before, and when the feline emerged unscathed, she figured it was safe enough for her. Mrs. Taylor suffered a cut on her head, but was otherwise unharmed, though she did tell the press, "If it was with my dying breath, I would caution anyone against attempting the feat. I would sooner walk up to the mouth of a cannon, knowing it was going to blow me to pieces than make another trip over the Falls."

If all the above sounds like a lot of baloney, we merely note the appropriateness of today being National Bologna Day, and leave you make up your own mind.

See you next time!

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Ask a Stupid Question, You Get a Spark Like This One
By Dave Sikula
Mon, September 27, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

George
"Hey! Shouldn't you be gettin' back
to work or somethin'?
Greetings once again from The Spark. We don't know about you, but last week's epic nearly killed us in the writing, so this week's will be shorter, and, we hope, sweeter.

Monday:

Let's begin by noting that it's Ask a Stupid Question Day, created by teachers to let their students ask away without fear of mockery. We agree that the idea is a good one, for those questions may well lead to good answers, though probably not as good as the one Albert Einstein asked in 1905, when the physics journal "Annalen der Physik" published his paper "Does the Inertia of a Body Depend Upon Its Energy Content?" and got the answered "E=mc²." We’re not claiming to understand either the question or the answer, but physicists sure did.

That wasn't the only question answered on this day, though. In 1822, French linguist Jean-Francois Champollion announced that he had deciphered the Rosetta Stone. For those unwilling to ask, it’s an engraved slab that had been discovered in 1799 in Rashid (or Rosetta), Egypt, and combined ancient hieroglyphics with Egyptian and Greek letters. Champollion’s deciphering of the text gave archaeologists their first real means to interpret ancient pictographs. It’s been on display in the British Museum since 1802, and is the most-visited object in that institution to this day.

If you're still interested in trivia, we point you to the small town of Lancaster, PA. In 1777, it was the capital of the United States -- but for only one day. Speaking of the capital reminds us of politics, which reminds us of cartoonist Thomas Nast, born on this day in 1840. Nast was, among other things, the man who gave us the Republican elephant, the Democratic donkey, Uncle Sam, and the modern depiction of Santa Claus.

Not so jolly was Henry Ford. In 1908, Ford’s first Model T rolled off the assembly line. The automobile went on sale Oct. 1 for $825 (just under $20,000 in modern currency), but soon became a national sensation, opening up personal transportation for the masses. By 1925, Ford's assembly line technique had become so efficient, that the price of the car had dropped to $265 -- or just over $3,000 today).

Turning to television, we see that today is not only the 56th anniversary of "Tonight!" -- which soon became "The Tonight Show" hosted by Steve Allen (and today is the 90th birthday of Steve's widow, Jayne Meadows), we also see that coming up on the October 1st is the 48th anniversary of Johnny Carson taking over the "Tonight" host's chair he'd occupy for the next 29 years. Unfortunately, NBC, not sensing any historical value in the show, erased most of the tapes of the show's early years. In fact, it's only in the last couple of weeks that the audio track of the first three minutes of Carson's first show surfaced after decades of being lost. (Unfortunately, the video is still missing.) "Tonight" was a real gamble on the part of NBC executive Sylvester "Pat" Weaver (father of Sigourney Weaver, by the way), in that no one knew if anyone would stay up into the wee hours to watch TV. I think we know the answer to that particular question nowadays ... (For those who need help, though, it is National Coffee Day.)

We see that the new season of "Sesame Street" begins today, but we assume we won't be seeing any sign of Katy Perry.

Tuesday:

In 1901, Ed Sullivan was born. Sullivan came to fame in the 1920s and '30s covering Broadway and Hollywood gossip (not to mention his bitter feuds with rival columnist Walter Winchell). From 1948 to 1971, though, he became in integral part of American culture by hosting a weekly variety show that featured singers, plate spinners, ventriloquists, comedians, and everything in between in an attempt to entertain every part of the audience.

Variety shows like Sullivan's have all but disappeared from the airwaves, but there's one that began decades before his program and continues to the present day -- this day especially, as, following the tragic floods in Tennessee this spring, the Grand Ole Opry will return to its home to continue its 85-year tradition of broadcasting the finest in country music.

That's not the only show tonight, though. On PBS, Ken Burns's "The Tenth Inning" premieres, continuing his 1994 series on the history of baseball. Ironically, the show airs on the 90th anniversary of one of the game's greatest scandals: the indictment of eight members of the Chicago White Sox, who were accused of throwing the 1919 World Series to the Cincinnati Reds.

Gambling itself may be a disease, but it’s not one that can be cured with antibiotics, like penicillin, which Alexander Fleming discovered on this day in 1928. Dr. Fleming noticed that one of the molds in his lab was killing bacteria. Within months, he had released it to the world, giving doctors an irreplaceable tool in the treating of disease. (Speaking of gambling, we’d like to think we could win a bet that the transition into that paragraph was one of the most awkward ever.)

Wednesday:

On the docket today: the 110th birthday of singing cowboy Gene Autry. Autry had worked as a ranch hand in his youth, but realized his future lay in entertainment. By 1928, he was singing on the radio; by 1929, he was making records; and by 1934, he was making movies. The pictures were cheaply made, but from 1936 to 1954 (with time out for service in World War II), he was one of the top-grossing stars in Hollywood. He was able to parlay his screen fame into a broadcasting empire and ownership of the (then) California Angels. When he died in 1998 (a mere three days after turning 91), he was one of the wealthiest men in America and remains the only person with five stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

Thursday:

You ever played with a Frisbee? Of course you have -- well, either a Frisbee or a generic flying plastic disc. In 1958, the Wham-O company patented the toy. It, which was originally named the "Pluto Platter," but got its present name with Wham-O executive heard that Boston college kids (who were used to sailing pie plates from the local Frisbie Pie Company) were calling the platters "frisbies," and the rest is marketing history.

We don't believe they had Frisbees in Bedrock (after all, everything in that town is made of rock, which doesn’t tend to sail real well), but if they did, we would have found out about them starting 50 years ago tonight, when "The Flintstones" premiered in prime time on ABC.

While the Frisbee and "The Flintstones" were good ideas, tonight is the chance to celebrate not-so-good ideas, as the annual Ig Nobel Prizes will be awarded for discoveries "that cannot, or should not, be reproduced." In other words, they're the gold standard for bad ideas.

In 1954, singer and actress Julie Andrews made her Broadway debut, starring in the musical "The Boy Friend," the day before she turned 19. (She, of course, turns 75 tomorrow.)

On a sadder note, it was on this day in 1955, that actor James Dean was killed in a car crash. Dean had made only a few films (though he'd made numerous appearances on live television dramas), but his personality and acting style influenced and impacted a generation of Americans and actors.

Friday:

Beginnings and endings today:

In 1890, both Yosemite National Park and Yellowstone National Park were established by the U.S. Congress.

In 1957, the words "In God We Trust" made their first appearance on U.S. paper currency. (Frankly, we were surprised it was so late in American history.)

In 1968, George A. Romero's "Night of the Living Dead" opened, beginning a cycle that has subjected audiences to an endless series of zombie and vampire movies. Talk about not dying!

For those who can't get enough Disney (in which number we do not include ourselves), in 1971, Walt Disney World opened in Orlando, FL, followed in 1982 by the EPCOT Center. EPCOT, which is an acronym for “Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow” was intended by Uncle Walt to be a testing ground for new and innovative domestic theories and products, soon turned into just another tourist trap. Oh, well; the best-laid plans of mice ...

On the same day that EPCOT opened, Sony introduced their first compact disc player (the CDP-101, which looks about as big as a Buick). While nowadays, the CD is just about as dead as vinyl, it was, in its time, beyond ultra-modern.

The farewell is from Babe Ruth. Ruth's name has come to be synonymous with baseball, and while his hitting prowess speaks for itself, he’d be a Hall of Famer for his pitching alone. He was one of the greatest left-handers of all time, winning almost 100 games in his career. In 1933, he made his final appearance on the mound, beating his former team, the Boston Red Sox, 6-5. He pitched all nine innings, giving up twelve hits (no strikeouts), and hitting a homer.

Finally, today is International Raccoon Appreciation Day. If only it were Weasel Appreciation Day, we could feel sorry for Tony Hayward, who's stepping down as the head of BP.

Saturday:

Today's birthdays include three of the greatest comedians in showbiz history. First is Groucho Marx (1890), the most verbose of the Marx Brothers, who turned insults and wisecracks into an art form. Second is Bud Abbott (1895), who partnered for years with Lou Costello, and who is generally considered the greatest straight man of all time. Last is George "Spanky" McFarland, the child actor who became the leader of the kid group known as either "Our Gang" and "The Little Rascals."

Two other birthdays are of men who couldn't be more different. 1452 saw the birth of England's King Richard III. Shakespeare painted Richard as a manipulator who lied and murdered his way to the throne, but recent reappraisals have called him either benevolent or, at worst, benign. The other is Mohandas Gandhi (1869), better known as Mahatma Gandhi, whose nonviolent policies led to the independence of India from the British Empire.

In that period of history (the late 19th century), that empire spanned the globe, so that it was the perfect atmosphere for the fictional Phileas Fogg to make his 1872 wager that he could travel around the world in eighty days. Fogg used almost every means of transportation available to him in those less-advanced times, except a hot-air balloon, which makes this week's International Balloon Fiesta in Albuquerque, NM, slightly ironic.

Three anniversaries that we've tried to link, but just can't: In 1919, President Woodrow Wilson suffered a massive stroke, which left him partially paralyzed and unable to fulfill his duties, so until his recovery, the country was basically run by his wife Edith.
Charles M. Schulz's comic strip "Peanuts" began running. Schulz ended the strip in 2000, and in an odd twist of fate, died the day before the last Sunday page ran.

Finally in 1959, "The Twilight Zone" premiered. Even though it ran only five seasons, it's still the gold standard for creepy television, and its guitar-riff theme song, which signifies something odd happening, is known to even those who never saw the show.

Sunday:

Let's begin the end of the week by wishing Barack and Michelle Obama a happy 18th wedding anniversary. (And just to remind you, Mr. President, porcelain is the traditional gift.)

Like the "Odd Couple" juxtaposition of Gandhi and Richard above, today's pairing is just as jarring. In 1873, Emily Post was born. She devoted her life to the gospels of etiquette and good manners. On the other hand, we have Harvey Kurtzman, born in 1902. Kurtzman gave us, among other things, Mad Magazine (the original, funny version), and his sense of humor has influenced pretty much everyone from the Pythons to the writers of the National Lampoon (again, the original, funny version), who went on to create or inspire everything from "Animal House" to "Saturday Night Live," and even David Letterman. By extension, Kurtzman influenced almost every American comedian and comedy movie of the second half of the Twentieth Century.

There are exceptions, though, such as "The Andy Griffith Show," which premiered in 1960, or "The Dick Van Dyke Show" (1961). The contrast of the two shows, with their respective rural and urban perspectives, set the standards for television comedies for the next ten years, even if they were neither particularly satirical nor Kurtzmanesque.

We'll close the week by mentioning that it’s the 15th anniversary of O.J. Simpson being acquitted of the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman, and then pausing while you say, "That's fifteen years ago? Wow."

See you next time!

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The Good, the Awful, and the Utterly Odd
By Dave Sikula
Mon, September 6, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Alex the parrot and a dish of colored blocks
Alex had a vocabulary of 150 words.
That's more than some people we know.
Welcome once again to The Spark, your guide to the week's events, anniversaries, and commemorations.

We'll be frank about this week in particular, though; it's always tough to find events around September 11. It's not easy to maintain our (hopefully) snarky tone around such an anniversary, but we'll do our best.

Monday:

Well, obviously, it's Labor Day, which leads us to ask just where in the world the summer went. Wasn't it Memorial Day about ten minutes ago?

We also look at a couple of deaths today. In 1901, anarchist Leon Czolgosz went to the Pan-American Exposition in Buffalo, NY, and shot President William McKinley. McKinley didn't die right away; he lingered for a couple of days before passing. Czolgosz never expressed remorse for the murder and was electrocuted on October 29, 1901. So outraged were people by the murder, though, that his family was refused the right to take the body for interment, and it was buried in the prison grounds, where it was dissolved with a combination of quicklime and acid.

In 2007, Alex, the African Grey parrot who was trained by Dr. Irene Pepperberg, died of sudden and unexplained causes. Alex had a vocabulary of about 150 words, and his intelligence was rated at about the level of a five-year-old human. He could distinguish between shapes, colors, and numbers; had an understanding of the concepts of "zero," and personal pronouns; and could lie and joke.

Two TV premieres tonight. One is "The Cat in the Hat Knows a Lot About That" on PBS. It's another one of those public television shows that teaches things to kids, but we have to ask when the Cat, who's nothing but a disruptive anarchist in his books by Dr. Seuss, became an authority figure to be listened to. The other premiere is a show on Cartoon Network based on "Mad" Magazine. Guess there's just not enough content out there for adolescents with undeveloped senses of humor. What hath Judd Apatow wrought?

Tuesday:

In 1921, 16-year-old Margaret Gorman won the Golden Mermaid pageant in Atlantic City, NJ. The pageant was a publicity stunt designed to keep tourists in the city after Labor Day, and officials, no slouches when it came to hyperbole, named Gorman "Miss America." The pageant, which morphed from a beauty contest to a scholarship event, used to be a major part of American pop culture, but in recent years has faded to become a failed reality show followed by yet another Vegas spectacle. Sic transit gloria mundi. (Though we don't know if she ever won the crown.)

On this day in 1930, the "Blondie" comic strip debuted. We've all run across "Blondie" in our time, but we'll wager you didn't know that Blondie's maiden name was Boopadoop, that she started out life as a gold-digging flapper, or that Dagwood was the son of a millionaire, who disowned him for marrying Blondie. Regardless, the Bumsteads have been married since 1933. That’s a heckuva lot of sandwiches.

Wednesday:

So, Monday, we were talking about Leon Czolgosz, and today we'll mention the 169th birthday of Charles J. Guiteau, who shot President James Garfield in 1881. Guiteau was probably the craziest of all Presidential assassins, shooting Garfield because he had never been appointed consul to France, despite his lack of any qualification.

Speaking of unusal political figures, Lyndon LaRouche turns 88 today. LaRouche, is a perennial Presidential candidate who holds, shal we say, "unique" views, including his belief that Queen Elizabeth is the head of an international drug cartel.

While it’s easy to laugh at LaRouche for the wrong reasons, it's also the birthdays of two men at whom it's easy to laugh for the right reasons: Sid Caesar (1922) and Peter Sellers (1925). Caesar was a television superstar in the 1950s, headlining two comedy programs that, thanks to writing staffs that included Mel Brooks, Neil Simon, Woody Allen, and Larry Gelbart, turned out 90 minutes of classic live comedy every week -- just like "Saturday Night Live," only funny!

Sellers came to fame as a writer and actor on the legendary "Goon Show," whose crazy comedy paved the way for "Monty Python’s Flying Circus," among others. He soon moved on to films, playing multiple roles in such classics as "The Mouse That Roared" and "Dr. Strangelove," before finding film immortality as the blithely incompetent Inspector Clouseau in the "Pink Panther" films.

A couple of musical anniversaries today. In 1932, Patsy Cline was born. Her soulful singing style made her one of the first country singers to cross over to the pop charts. Unfortunately, she was killed in a plane crash at the age of 30. In 1935, a 19-year-old Frank Sinatra made his radio debut as part of the "Hoboken Four" on "Major Bowes' Amateur Hour." The Amateur Hour was a fixture of American entertainment for nearly 40 years and was the "American Idol" of its day; the only difference being that Major Bowes’s contestants were usually talented.

Speaking of talent, it was on this day in 1504 that Michelangelo's "David" was unveiled in Florence. The 17-foot-tall statue on a naked male soon became iconic, and has probably been as mocked and imitated as any work of art since.

While the David was quite an invention, it's not quite as useful as Scotch tape, which made its debut in 1930, when Richard Drew was trying to come up with a product that would allow the painting of sharp lines on automobiles.

In 1892, an early version of the Pledge of Allegiance appeared in "The Youth's Companion" magazine. Suffice it to say, the original did not include the phrase, "One nation under God," which was added by Congress in 1954 at the height of the Red Scare, in order to distinguish America from the Godless Communists of the Soviet Union. Those very Communists were provided with some kind of help -- divine or not -- starting in 1941, when the Siege of Leningrad began. For 872 days, the second-largest city in the Soviet Union was held under siege by the German army. No supplies got in or out, and Leningrad's citizens were forced to scavenge everything they could in order to survive harsh winters and constant bombardment. There are stories that they even had to resort to cannibalism. Regardless, their withstanding of the Nazis is one of the great stories of perseverance in world history.

Not as heroic, but certainly persistent and hard to avoid is "Star Trek," which premiered in 1966. Trekkies may be nerdish and obsessed (for example, we're sure there are those of them who would object to not being called "Trekkers"), but they're certainly literate. And they may well be celebrating International Literacy Day today.

Finally, we note that it's Rosh Hashanah and the beginning of the Jewish high holidays.

Thursday:

A number of birthdays today, including two that run from the sublime to the ridiculous -- which man fits into which category, we leave to you. Colonel Harland Sanders, the founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken was born in 1890, and Mario Batali, the chef who revolutionized American cooking, by, for nothing else, his use of offal and internal organs in his recipes.

To our uncultivated palates, such a diet would lead to a mutiny, which is ironic in that it's also the 256th birthday of William Bligh, whose harsh treatment of his crew led to the mutiny on HMS Bounty. On the other hand, such victuals may well have appealed to Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec, the diminutive French artist who died in 1901. (We can’t speak as to whether such a diet led to either his diminished stature or his death. We just report 'em.)

In more baffling events, the NFL season begins tonight with the Minnesota Vikings taking on the New Orleans Saints. (It's baffling because football is a sport for the fall and winter months, and we're still a couple of weeks from the Autumnal Equinox). Also, the new season of "The Vampire Diaries" begins tonight, and we have to wonder just what we have to do to stop this mania for vampires and zombies! Enough already! (Although, maybe Viking quarterback Brett Favre's eerie longevity is due to his being either a vampire or a zombie. Just sayin'.)

Friday:

It's a day for things we like and admire. For example, it's Raymond Scott's 102nd birthday. Scott was a composer and bandleader in the 1930s and '40s who wrote avant-garde songs, many of which (most notably "Powerhouse") were used by composer Carl Stalling when writing the scores for Warner Bros. cartoons. We're also glad to celebrate the big 5-0 with actor Colin Firth, who always turns in good work, but who especially endeared himself to many a Janeite with he portrayal of Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy in the 1995 version of "Pride and Prejudice." Musician Jerry Lee Lewis will perform on Broadway tonight with the cast of "Million Dollar Quartet."And we like the "Stand Up to Cancer" telethon, which will take over the television airwaves tonight in order to raise funds to beat cancer.

Of course, not everything today is likeable. For example, you may recall that last week we mentioned the anniversary of the shooting of Louisiana politician Huey Long. Well, after a couple of days of being hospitalized, Long died-- though whether the fatal bullet came from the alleged assassin or his own bodyguards, no one knows.

Saturday:

As we alluded to earlier, it's hard to be snarky this week, and this day, especially, but we'll try.

First of all, we note the coincidence of ground being broken on this day in 1941 for the construction of the Pentagon, when 60 years later, it would be attacked along with the World Trade Center.

When we were kids, we all knew the words to "Oh, Susanna." (You know, "I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee ...") Well, it was first performed by its composer, Stephen Foster, in 1847 at the Eagle Saloon in Pittsburgh, PA. And how was Foster paid for the song? With a bottle of whiskey, which is an ending appropriate for the work of O. Henry, the writer who specialized in twist endings, and who was born in 1862.

Sunday:

We have a mixed bag to end the week.

First, the birthdays of two groundbreaking men. In 1880, H.L. Mencken was born. Mencken, "the Sage of Baltimore," was a reporter, critic, and etymologist, who acid coverage of politics and the Scopes "Monkey Trial" alone would have assured him immortality, but who crowned those accomplishments with his investigations into the roots of American English and by coining such maxims as "No one in this world, so far as I know -- and I have searched the records for years, and employed agents to help me -- has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people." -- usually misquoted as "No one ever went broke underestimating the good taste of the American public."

The other is Jesse Owens, born in 1913, Owens won four gold medals at the 1936 Berlin Olympics, forever destroying Hitler's dream of using the games to establish his myth of Aryan superiority.

As groundbreaking as those men were, though, their accomplishments fade in contrast to the French artisans who, 17,000 years ago created a series of cave paintings in Lascaux, France, that were discovered in 1940. The paintings, which depict thousands of human and animals, give paleontologists irreplacable insights into the lives and psychology of paleolithic humans.

Speaking human psychology, we’ll note that today in Russia is the Day of Conception. The Russian government is encouraging citizens of the Motherland to propagate today in hopes that there will be a baby boom on Russia Day, which is nine months from now on June 12.

We'll close this somewhat somber week by noting the 1995 death of actor Jeremy Brett. Brett labored in relative obscurity until in 1985, when he was cast as Sherlock Holmes. Almost overnight, he became the definitive Holmes for many of us, as his strong and quirky characterization matched the downright oddness of the literary Holmes.

See you next time.

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