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Here's To the Winners
By Dave Sikula
Thu, December 9, 2010, 12:01 am PST

The Milestone Mo-Tel today
The Milestone Mo-Tel today. Winners get one
free night. Losers get two. (That's the second
time we've used that joke today.)
If the whole world loves a winner, we have a weekend full of love ahead of us. Let's get started!

The most obvious winners will be declared Thursday when either Clint Robertson or Brandy Kuentzel wins the right to become Donald Trump's latest Apprentice for one year. (We hope that the loser isn't stuck for two years ...) One of the three remaining teams on "The Amazing Race" will win a million smackers on Sunday. (Perhaps eating that sheep's head may have been worth it.) It's almost guaranteed that none of these winners will make Barbara Walters' list of the year's "Most Fascinating People," (most fascinating to her, anyway ...) but we’ll find out for sure Thursday. (Our guess for #1 on her list? The cameraman who smears the Vaseline all over the lens that photographs her.) And on Friday, they'll be handing out the Nobel Prizes. The Nobels aren't like the Oscars; everyone already knows who won and the winners have actually accomplished something that matters, rather than playing loveable oddballs.

Saturday we'll see some sports winners. In the afternoon, someone (Cam Newton? Andrew Luck? LaMichael James?) will win the Heisman Trophy as the nation's finest college football player, and in the evening, either Georges St-Pierre or Josh Koscheck will take the welterweight championship at UFC 124 in Montreal. We assume the combatants will not resort to wheeling around the ring in roller skates, but while it would be appropriate (given that Thursday marks the anniversary of their 1884 patent), we'd have to warn them that such a thing would be just plain dangerous.)

Sunday also marks the 10th anniversary of the U.S. Supreme Court's ruling in Bush v. Gore, which ensured that George W. Bush became the nation's 43rd president. Whether that made the country a winner or a loser, we'll leave up to you. Falling into a similar category is Larry King's retirement from his CNN talk show on Friday. (As with President Bush, we won't say whether that's a plus or a minus.)

Weary travelers were winners 85 years ago Sunday, when the Milestone Mo-Tel, the world's first motel (short for "motor hotel"), opened in San Luis Obispo, California.

If we stretch the definition of "winner" to include those whose birthdays fall this weekend, then we're lousy with winners. For example, Thursday sees the birthdays of both Margaret Hamilton (1902) and Redd Foxx (1922). Hamilton is best known for her role as the Wicked Witch of the West in the 1939 classic, "The Wizard of Oz." Despite her indelible portrayal of one of the screen's great villains, Hamilton loved children and was a lifelong advocate for charities that benefitted kids and animals. Foxx was someone whose work, on the other hand, was decidedly not for kids. A veteran of the black vaudeville entertainment venues known as the "Chitlin' Circuit," Foxx recorded a series of "party records" in the 1950s that were both filthy and hilarious. He reached a mainstream fame in the '70s when he starred in "Sanford and Son," where his frequent feigned heart attacks were one of the show's running gags. In a supreme irony, he suffered an actual heart attack while rehearsing for another television show, but no one believed was it real until it was too late.

Sunday would have been the 95th birthday of Frank Sinatra. The greatest popular singer of the 20th century, Sinatra was also an Oscar-winning actor, starred in numerous TV specials that consisted of nothing but him singing with his guests, and was the biggest attraction in Las Vegas when that title actually meant something.

Monday, we celebrate the 192nd birthday of Mary Todd Lincoln, wife of Abraham Lincoln who was criticized in her time for her extravagant and spendthrift ways, and committed to a psychiatric hospital by her son Robert. While she was undoubtedly depressed, wouldn't any woman who’d lived through the death of three sons and the murder of her husband (while sitting next to him) feel the same? She was eventually declared competent and released, but her health was broken, and she died three years later.

If birthday celebrants are winners, so too are those is show business who meet success, like performers and lovers of country music, who can celebrate the 83rd anniversary of the first broadcast of the Grand Ole Opry on Friday. The Opry has been a staple of radio and television in the decades since it debuted, highlighting the best in country, from Hank Williams and Minnie Pearl to Clint Black and Carrie Underwood. Someone who's appeared at the Opry (but has yet to be inducted into its member ranks) is Taylor Swift. Perhaps the Opry has been waiting for her to turn 21 - in which case, it need wait no longer! The Grammy-winning singer reaches her majority on Monday.

Thursday will see the annual airing of the Rankin-Bass animated Christmas special, "The Year without a Santa Claus," which features memorable turns by Snow Miser and Heat Miser (who are also not members of the Opry).

Friday is also the 55th anniversary of the "Mighty Mouse Playhouse's" television premiere. In TV's early days, broadcasters were desperate for material to air, so old movies and cartoons were natural fodder, and Paul Terry's "Mighty Mouse" cartoons were some of the oddest programs to come to the screen. Mini operatic melodramas, they featured the eponymous rodent singing his was through battles with the villainous Oil Can Harry. Mighty made a brief comeback in the 80s in a brilliant TV series produced by Ralph Bakshi, but he's been in retirement since self-appointed censor Donald Wildmon mistook the mouse's flower sniffing for drug use. (No, really.) Wildmon isn't the only well-intentioned, if-misguided, protector we mention, though, since Thursday is the anniversary of the founding of the John Birch Society, which has been protecting Americans from the Communists lurking under their beds for 52 years.

Legitimate do-gooders have something to celebrate this weekend, too. Thursday is the U.N's annual International Anti-Corruption Day, dedicated to wiping out, well, corruption and promoting the rule of law, and Friday is both Human Rights Day and the beginning of Human Rights Week.

We end by noting a delightful juxtaposition on Thursday. December 9, 1792, saw the first cremation in America, when statesman Henry Laurens died at his plantation in Charleston, South Carolina, and per his will, his body was burned. On the same date in 1886, Clarence Birdseye, inventor of frozen food was born. We're reminded of the choice Curly Howard was given in a Three Stooges short: to be burned at the stake or to have his head cut off. He opted for the former, on the reasoning that a hot stake's better than a cold chop. Good night!

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Ladies' Day
By Dave Sikula
Wed, December 1, 2010, 12:01 am PST

Rosa Parks' booking photo
Rosa Parks. They wouldn't even
let her sit while booking her.
Yesterday, we called attention to three historical wits (Swift, Twain, and Wilde), and today is the turn of more contemporary comics. Wednesday is the 75th birthday of filmmaker Woody Allen, and would have been the 70th birthday of comedian Richard Pryor. Allen is the Academy Award-winning director of such movies as "Annie Hall," "Bullets Over Broadway," "Radio Days," and "Hannah and Her Sisters." He'a been nominated for 16 Oscars (winning three), and has directed actors (Penelope Cruz, Michael Caine, Diane Keaton, Mira Sorvino, and Dianne Wiest – twice) to six. Pryor was the pioneering stand-up whose earthy and vulgar routines brought new life to live comedy in the 70s. He was loved and emulated by his peers (Jerry Seinfeld called him "The Picasso of our profession," and Bob Newhart described him as "the seminal comedian of the last 50 years"). As loved as he was by comedians and audiences, Hollywood didn't seem to know what to do with him, and, with only a few exceptions, his films were not always good. Plagued by addictions during his later life, he succumbed to multiple sclerosis at the age of 65.

Pryor and Allen aren't the only ones celebrating birthdays today. In 1891, James Naismith was trying to control a group of rowdy kids who were stuck indoors at the YMCA in Springfield, Massachusetts. Naismith nailed a couple of peach baskets to the walls, and invented "basket ball," thus giving birth to the hoops we know today. The game has changed slightly in the ensuing century, and will see a notable event Thursday when LeBron James makes his return to Cleveland, as the Heat take on the Cavs. We expect chaos to ensue, which is an odd way to begin National Stress-Free Family Holiday Month. Perhaps a round of Bingo would help everyone get along. Conveniently, December is "Bingo's Birthday Month," which aims to call attention one of America's other favorite pastimes.

If even more stress reduction is needed, fans can concentrate on soccer, as there are few diversions that are more sleep-inducing. Fortunately, FIFA will be on hand to remind us of the "beautiful game," as they'll be announcing on Thursday the unfortunate cities chosen to host the 2018 and 2022 World Cups.

We were surprised to see that France isn't in the running to host either of those competitions, but the French will be busy Thursday commemorating both Napoleon Bonaparte's 1804 self-coronation as Emperor of France, and the anniversary of the death of the Marquis de Sade, the aristocratic writer who lived a, shall we say, interesting lifestyle, that 200 years later, is still too hot for prime time - and for The Spark.

Let's move on to something a little more wholesome - holiday shopping, for example. And what would the holidays be without toys and ties? December is both Safe Toys and Gifts Month and National Tie Month. While we all want kids to be healthy and safe, we kind of long for the days of our youth when toys were made of metal with sharp edges, or loaded with cannonballs. Oh, well, better to stick with a nice cravat for Dad. It's dull, but won't put his eye out.

We tip our hats to three notable women over the next couple of days. Thursday would have been the birthday of the ultimate opera diva Maria Callas. Callas was born in New York in 1923 and by her 30s, had become one of the biggest names in opera history. Unfortunately, her singing and acting style - not to mention her fiery temperament and life off-stage - made her highly controversial.

On December 1, 1952, the New York Daily News reported that former Army GI George Jorgensen had returned from Denmark as Christine Jorgenson, becoming the first person to undergo a widely-publicized sexual reassignment surgery. Jorgensen spent the remaining 37 years of her life lecturing and performing as a cabaret singer, delivering such tongue-in-cheek numbers as "I Enjoy Being a Girl."

Three years later, African-American civil rights worker Rosa Parks was arrested in Montgomery, Alabama, for refusing to give her seat to a white passenger. Her arrest sparked a boycott of the entire Montgomery bus system that ended only when a Supreme Court order ruled that Montgomery's segregated bus system unconstitutional.

A iconic fictional woman made her debut on December 2, 1947, when Tennessee Williams' masterpiece, "A Streetcar Named Desire" opened on Broadway. While Marlon Brando's brutish Stanley Kowalski got a lot of attention, the play actually focuses on the travails of the DuBois sisters, Stella and Blanche. Blanche DuBois came to represent the epitome of the cracked Southern belle, whose genteel ways cwere no match for the modern world. The role spans a wide emotional range, and has always been catnip for actresses wanting to test their mettle, including Jessica Tandy (the original), Vivien Leigh, Jessica Lange, Ann-Margret, Rachel Weisz, and Cate Blanchett.

In what may - or may not - be a notable event for women, we note in passing that December 1, 1953, saw the publication of the first issue of "Playboy" magazine.

At sundown on Wednesday, Hanukkah begins. This eight day celebration commemorates the rededication of Jerusalem's Second Temple in the 2nd century BCE.

Lastly, we note that December 1 is both World AIDS Day and the Day (With)Out Art. The former is dedicated to raising awareness of AIDS and HIV, while the latter is devoted to the artists who were lost to AIDS and the works of art they never produced.

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Ask a Stupid Question, You Get a Spark Like This One
By Dave Sikula
Mon, September 27, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

George
"Hey! Shouldn't you be gettin' back
to work or somethin'?
Greetings once again from The Spark. We don't know about you, but last week's epic nearly killed us in the writing, so this week's will be shorter, and, we hope, sweeter.

Monday:

Let's begin by noting that it's Ask a Stupid Question Day, created by teachers to let their students ask away without fear of mockery. We agree that the idea is a good one, for those questions may well lead to good answers, though probably not as good as the one Albert Einstein asked in 1905, when the physics journal "Annalen der Physik" published his paper "Does the Inertia of a Body Depend Upon Its Energy Content?" and got the answered "E=mc²." We’re not claiming to understand either the question or the answer, but physicists sure did.

That wasn't the only question answered on this day, though. In 1822, French linguist Jean-Francois Champollion announced that he had deciphered the Rosetta Stone. For those unwilling to ask, it’s an engraved slab that had been discovered in 1799 in Rashid (or Rosetta), Egypt, and combined ancient hieroglyphics with Egyptian and Greek letters. Champollion’s deciphering of the text gave archaeologists their first real means to interpret ancient pictographs. It’s been on display in the British Museum since 1802, and is the most-visited object in that institution to this day.

If you're still interested in trivia, we point you to the small town of Lancaster, PA. In 1777, it was the capital of the United States -- but for only one day. Speaking of the capital reminds us of politics, which reminds us of cartoonist Thomas Nast, born on this day in 1840. Nast was, among other things, the man who gave us the Republican elephant, the Democratic donkey, Uncle Sam, and the modern depiction of Santa Claus.

Not so jolly was Henry Ford. In 1908, Ford’s first Model T rolled off the assembly line. The automobile went on sale Oct. 1 for $825 (just under $20,000 in modern currency), but soon became a national sensation, opening up personal transportation for the masses. By 1925, Ford's assembly line technique had become so efficient, that the price of the car had dropped to $265 -- or just over $3,000 today).

Turning to television, we see that today is not only the 56th anniversary of "Tonight!" -- which soon became "The Tonight Show" hosted by Steve Allen (and today is the 90th birthday of Steve's widow, Jayne Meadows), we also see that coming up on the October 1st is the 48th anniversary of Johnny Carson taking over the "Tonight" host's chair he'd occupy for the next 29 years. Unfortunately, NBC, not sensing any historical value in the show, erased most of the tapes of the show's early years. In fact, it's only in the last couple of weeks that the audio track of the first three minutes of Carson's first show surfaced after decades of being lost. (Unfortunately, the video is still missing.) "Tonight" was a real gamble on the part of NBC executive Sylvester "Pat" Weaver (father of Sigourney Weaver, by the way), in that no one knew if anyone would stay up into the wee hours to watch TV. I think we know the answer to that particular question nowadays ... (For those who need help, though, it is National Coffee Day.)

We see that the new season of "Sesame Street" begins today, but we assume we won't be seeing any sign of Katy Perry.

Tuesday:

In 1901, Ed Sullivan was born. Sullivan came to fame in the 1920s and '30s covering Broadway and Hollywood gossip (not to mention his bitter feuds with rival columnist Walter Winchell). From 1948 to 1971, though, he became in integral part of American culture by hosting a weekly variety show that featured singers, plate spinners, ventriloquists, comedians, and everything in between in an attempt to entertain every part of the audience.

Variety shows like Sullivan's have all but disappeared from the airwaves, but there's one that began decades before his program and continues to the present day -- this day especially, as, following the tragic floods in Tennessee this spring, the Grand Ole Opry will return to its home to continue its 85-year tradition of broadcasting the finest in country music.

That's not the only show tonight, though. On PBS, Ken Burns's "The Tenth Inning" premieres, continuing his 1994 series on the history of baseball. Ironically, the show airs on the 90th anniversary of one of the game's greatest scandals: the indictment of eight members of the Chicago White Sox, who were accused of throwing the 1919 World Series to the Cincinnati Reds.

Gambling itself may be a disease, but it’s not one that can be cured with antibiotics, like penicillin, which Alexander Fleming discovered on this day in 1928. Dr. Fleming noticed that one of the molds in his lab was killing bacteria. Within months, he had released it to the world, giving doctors an irreplaceable tool in the treating of disease. (Speaking of gambling, we’d like to think we could win a bet that the transition into that paragraph was one of the most awkward ever.)

Wednesday:

On the docket today: the 110th birthday of singing cowboy Gene Autry. Autry had worked as a ranch hand in his youth, but realized his future lay in entertainment. By 1928, he was singing on the radio; by 1929, he was making records; and by 1934, he was making movies. The pictures were cheaply made, but from 1936 to 1954 (with time out for service in World War II), he was one of the top-grossing stars in Hollywood. He was able to parlay his screen fame into a broadcasting empire and ownership of the (then) California Angels. When he died in 1998 (a mere three days after turning 91), he was one of the wealthiest men in America and remains the only person with five stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

Thursday:

You ever played with a Frisbee? Of course you have -- well, either a Frisbee or a generic flying plastic disc. In 1958, the Wham-O company patented the toy. It, which was originally named the "Pluto Platter," but got its present name with Wham-O executive heard that Boston college kids (who were used to sailing pie plates from the local Frisbie Pie Company) were calling the platters "frisbies," and the rest is marketing history.

We don't believe they had Frisbees in Bedrock (after all, everything in that town is made of rock, which doesn’t tend to sail real well), but if they did, we would have found out about them starting 50 years ago tonight, when "The Flintstones" premiered in prime time on ABC.

While the Frisbee and "The Flintstones" were good ideas, tonight is the chance to celebrate not-so-good ideas, as the annual Ig Nobel Prizes will be awarded for discoveries "that cannot, or should not, be reproduced." In other words, they're the gold standard for bad ideas.

In 1954, singer and actress Julie Andrews made her Broadway debut, starring in the musical "The Boy Friend," the day before she turned 19. (She, of course, turns 75 tomorrow.)

On a sadder note, it was on this day in 1955, that actor James Dean was killed in a car crash. Dean had made only a few films (though he'd made numerous appearances on live television dramas), but his personality and acting style influenced and impacted a generation of Americans and actors.

Friday:

Beginnings and endings today:

In 1890, both Yosemite National Park and Yellowstone National Park were established by the U.S. Congress.

In 1957, the words "In God We Trust" made their first appearance on U.S. paper currency. (Frankly, we were surprised it was so late in American history.)

In 1968, George A. Romero's "Night of the Living Dead" opened, beginning a cycle that has subjected audiences to an endless series of zombie and vampire movies. Talk about not dying!

For those who can't get enough Disney (in which number we do not include ourselves), in 1971, Walt Disney World opened in Orlando, FL, followed in 1982 by the EPCOT Center. EPCOT, which is an acronym for “Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow” was intended by Uncle Walt to be a testing ground for new and innovative domestic theories and products, soon turned into just another tourist trap. Oh, well; the best-laid plans of mice ...

On the same day that EPCOT opened, Sony introduced their first compact disc player (the CDP-101, which looks about as big as a Buick). While nowadays, the CD is just about as dead as vinyl, it was, in its time, beyond ultra-modern.

The farewell is from Babe Ruth. Ruth's name has come to be synonymous with baseball, and while his hitting prowess speaks for itself, he’d be a Hall of Famer for his pitching alone. He was one of the greatest left-handers of all time, winning almost 100 games in his career. In 1933, he made his final appearance on the mound, beating his former team, the Boston Red Sox, 6-5. He pitched all nine innings, giving up twelve hits (no strikeouts), and hitting a homer.

Finally, today is International Raccoon Appreciation Day. If only it were Weasel Appreciation Day, we could feel sorry for Tony Hayward, who's stepping down as the head of BP.

Saturday:

Today's birthdays include three of the greatest comedians in showbiz history. First is Groucho Marx (1890), the most verbose of the Marx Brothers, who turned insults and wisecracks into an art form. Second is Bud Abbott (1895), who partnered for years with Lou Costello, and who is generally considered the greatest straight man of all time. Last is George "Spanky" McFarland, the child actor who became the leader of the kid group known as either "Our Gang" and "The Little Rascals."

Two other birthdays are of men who couldn't be more different. 1452 saw the birth of England's King Richard III. Shakespeare painted Richard as a manipulator who lied and murdered his way to the throne, but recent reappraisals have called him either benevolent or, at worst, benign. The other is Mohandas Gandhi (1869), better known as Mahatma Gandhi, whose nonviolent policies led to the independence of India from the British Empire.

In that period of history (the late 19th century), that empire spanned the globe, so that it was the perfect atmosphere for the fictional Phileas Fogg to make his 1872 wager that he could travel around the world in eighty days. Fogg used almost every means of transportation available to him in those less-advanced times, except a hot-air balloon, which makes this week's International Balloon Fiesta in Albuquerque, NM, slightly ironic.

Three anniversaries that we've tried to link, but just can't: In 1919, President Woodrow Wilson suffered a massive stroke, which left him partially paralyzed and unable to fulfill his duties, so until his recovery, the country was basically run by his wife Edith.
Charles M. Schulz's comic strip "Peanuts" began running. Schulz ended the strip in 2000, and in an odd twist of fate, died the day before the last Sunday page ran.

Finally in 1959, "The Twilight Zone" premiered. Even though it ran only five seasons, it's still the gold standard for creepy television, and its guitar-riff theme song, which signifies something odd happening, is known to even those who never saw the show.

Sunday:

Let's begin the end of the week by wishing Barack and Michelle Obama a happy 18th wedding anniversary. (And just to remind you, Mr. President, porcelain is the traditional gift.)

Like the "Odd Couple" juxtaposition of Gandhi and Richard above, today's pairing is just as jarring. In 1873, Emily Post was born. She devoted her life to the gospels of etiquette and good manners. On the other hand, we have Harvey Kurtzman, born in 1902. Kurtzman gave us, among other things, Mad Magazine (the original, funny version), and his sense of humor has influenced pretty much everyone from the Pythons to the writers of the National Lampoon (again, the original, funny version), who went on to create or inspire everything from "Animal House" to "Saturday Night Live," and even David Letterman. By extension, Kurtzman influenced almost every American comedian and comedy movie of the second half of the Twentieth Century.

There are exceptions, though, such as "The Andy Griffith Show," which premiered in 1960, or "The Dick Van Dyke Show" (1961). The contrast of the two shows, with their respective rural and urban perspectives, set the standards for television comedies for the next ten years, even if they were neither particularly satirical nor Kurtzmanesque.

We'll close the week by mentioning that it’s the 15th anniversary of O.J. Simpson being acquitted of the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman, and then pausing while you say, "That's fifteen years ago? Wow."

See you next time!

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Who Gave Mugabe His Mojo?
By Robert Hubbard
Wed, March 4, 2009, 12:01 am PST

Robert Gabriel Mugabe
Robert Gabriel Mugabe
Twenty-nine years ago, Robert Mugabe became Zimbabwe's first Black prime minister and has retained power ever since. Throughout the years he has been called everything from a despot and a racist to "Frankenstein."

Mugabe, not one to stand silently under a barrage of insults, countered with his very own comparison by singing the praises of a certain German dictator of the mid-twentieth century. He said: "Hitler has only one objective: justice for his people, sovereignty for his people, recognition of the independence of his people and their rights over their resources ... If that is Hitler, then let me be a Hitler tenfold."

Maybe Mugabe, in his infallible wisdom, hit the nail on the head. He's got that stylish Hitler mustache down, that much is for sure, but has he got the same qualities of leadership we've all come to admire in that most famous of fascists? Lets take a look.

Opponents to Mugabe and his ZANU PF party can expect murder and torture to keep them in line. When election time rolls around every few years, voter intimidation and fraudulent ballot-counting are Mugabe's campaign strategies of choice. And, just like Adolf, he's targeted specific ethnic groups for human rights violations.

However, it seems that Robert Mugabe's glorious, if slightly -- just slightly -- iron-fisted, merciless, and violent rule is coming to an end, as his power has been diminished with a recent power-sharing deal. As we reflect on the reign of this great student of Hitler, we should salute his amazing ability to bring radical transformation to the nation of Zimbabwe. Zimbabwe today is rife with frightening difficulties including a devastating cholera epidemic and record-breaking hyperinflation. (The best economic estimates place it around 90 sextillion percent. This doesn't mean much until you consider that the official count for all the stars in the universe is only 70 sextillion!) In the last three decades, the country has gone from being the breadbasket of Southern Africa to a country that cannot feed itself. Way to go, Mugabe!

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Get Up! Stand Up!
By Liz Gill
Wed, December 10, 2008, 12:01 am PST

United Nations' Swords into Plowshares statue
United Nations' "Swords into Plowshares"
(Photo by David Paul Ohmer)
Today we mark the 60th anniversary of the United Nations General Assembly’s adoption of the International Declaration of Human Rights. While this document was first drafted in response to the atrocities conducted in World War II, today's anniversary serves as a reminder that countless people around the world still do not enjoy the basic rights of “life, liberty, and security of person.”

There are a wide variety of rights to which we as humans are thought to be entitled, and, as a result, a colorful array of organizations that use this day to champion their own causes -- frequently in creative ways. For example, the "Day Without a Gay" campaign encourages people to “call in gay” on December 10th in order to raise awareness of the struggle for gay rights. Amnesty International has a somewhat broader focus, and promotes the world’s largest letter-writing event, which asks people to write letters on behalf of prisoners of conscience and human rights defenders during the days that frame Human Rights Day.

High-profile celebrities sometimes lend their names to humanitarian causes, and a few commit generous amounts of time and money. Angelina Jolie and Nicole Kidman are both Goodwill Ambassadors for the United Nations, with Jolie focusing on refugees and Kidman on women’s empowerment and gender equality.

If all this talk of goodwill inspires you to help, but you don’t have an Angelina-sized bankroll, you might take this opportunity to get a holiday gift for the "Person Who Has Everything" on your list. Find out his or her issue of choice, then browse the hundreds of philanthropic organizations in the Yahoo! Directory, any of which would be thrilled to receive a modest donation in the name of your kith or kin.

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