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Fernandomania at Fifty
By Dave Sikula
Mon, November 1, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

One half of the Sistine Chapel ceiling
The Sistine Chapel ceiling. It would have
gone so much faster if Michelangelo had
skipped the second coat and used
a roller. (That joke never gets old.)
A new month brings new commemorations, events, and fun facts, so let's get to them!

Monday:

We’ll begin with the arts, and three of the artiest events occurred on this day. First, in 1512, the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel was exhibited to the public for the first time. It had taken Michelangelo four years to paint this mural of images from the Bible and it remains a top tourist attraction in Rome to this day.

Not to be outdone by Michelangelo, William Shakespeare chose this day to premiere two of his most-enduring plays, the first, "Othello," opened in 1604, and the second (also Shakespeare's last), "The Tempest," followed in 1611. Both plays premiered in London's Whitehall Palace.

If you feel inclined to create your own artistic masterpiece, today is the perfect day to start, since it's not only National Author's Day - but also the beginning of National Novel Writing Month. If you're unsure whether your novel is suitable for a general audience, you might consult the guidelines of the Motion Picture Association of America, whose movie rating system of G, M, R, X, went into effect on this day in 1968. (PG-13 and NC-17 were originally not part of the lineup; they were added in later years when further clarification was needed as to who could see which movies.)

An artist of a different type was Los Angeles Dodgers pitcher Fernando Valenzuela, who turns 50 today. Valenzuela was a 19-year-old rookie at the start of the 1981 season when he got the opening day assignment. Valenzuela responded with a five-hit shutout of the Houston Astros, and "Fernandomania" was born, as crowds flocked to ballparks to see the lefthander with the unorthodox delivery (he looked to the heavens while in his windup) and Mexican-Americans across the country adopted him as one of their own. He won his first eight starts, with four more shutouts, and by the end of the year had won 13 games and both the Rookie of the Year and Cy Young Awards – the only time such a feat has occurred.

Yesterday was, of course, Halloween, and tomorrow is All Souls' Day and the Day of the Dead, so that must mean that today is All Saints Day. Mentioning saints makes us think of heavenly foods, and few are more heavenly than peanut butter – a happy accident, since November is Peanut Butter Lover's Month. Even more coincidentally, today is World Vegan Day, the perfect day to indulge in a nice PBJ (provided there's no bacon, of course).

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BOO!
By Dave Sikula
Mon, October 25, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Houdini being lowered into the Water Torture Cell
It's not enough that he has to
hang from a broken ankle; he
also has to hold his breath for
three minutes and get out of
a locked cage.That's scary.
Even though this week is dominated by the spooky holiday at the end of it, let's see what's happening between now and then.

Monday:

We'll start with artists, in particular two who couldn't have been more different. In 1881, Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso, better known as just Picasso - was born in Malaga, Spain. In 1907, the flat perspectives and angular bodies of his "Les Demoiselles d'Avignon" - hit the art world like a bomb, and signaled the birth of cubism. Over the next 66 years, Picasso's creativity and originality were unrivaled, as he produced some 50,000 works and became the most famous artist in the world. (And, as a bonus, dressing as one of his canvases would make a fine Halloween costume.)

On the other hand, we have Roy Lichtenstein, whose 87th birthday falls on Wednesday. In the early 1960s, Lichtenstein started copying panels from comic books, plagiarizing the original work of such (better) artists as Jack Kirby, Russ Heath, Tony Abruzzo, Irv Novick, and Jerry Grandenetti, rarely, if ever, giving the original artists credit - or any of the huge fees he collected.

Thinking of more pleasant topics, we turn to leaf peeping, and remind you that we’re at the peak of the fall foliage season. Throughout the northern latitudes - especially in New England - tourists and natives are driving through the countryside watching leaves die and turn eye-popping shades of yellow, gold, and red. It seems like magic, which is appropriate, given that this is International Magic Week.

Speaking of magic, tonight is the Broadway premiere of Alfred Uhry's play "Driving Miss Daisy," starring James Earl Jones, Vanessa Redgrave, and Boyd Gaines. Seems odd that a 23-year old play that spawned an Oscar-winning film has never appeared on Broadway, but that's showbiz.

Jones and Redgrave are huge stars, but it's the birthday of one of the smallest: Billy Barty, born on this day in 1924. Barty was born with a form of dwarfism called cartilage-hair hypoplasia and stopped growing at 3'9". He started working in movies at the age of three, almost always playing a baby while still well into his teens, but in his adult years, he was a tireless worker for the rights of little people - and turned in a series of fine performances in such films as "The Day of the Locust" and "Foul Play."

Tuesday:

Today is the anniversary of the 1881 "Gunfight at the O.K. Corral" in Tombstone, Arizona. While the fight itself didn't actually take place in the corral, lasted only 30 seconds (although approximately 30 shots were fired in that time), and was essentially the result of a feud between the Earp and Clanton families, it's probably the most famous gunfight in Western history. It's the centerpiece of at least seven movies, and numerous television shows and novels.

We also note a number of debuts today. First is the 1982 premiere of "St. Elsewhere." "St. Elsewhere" was one of the most innovative television series in history; it combined gripping medical drama with in-jokes, bizarre plot twists, and possibly the most notorious finale in TV history, when it revealed that the show's entire six year run had been the imaginings of an autistic teenager. That said, it remains at the center of all television series, as the "Tommy Westphall Universe" theory posits that "90 percent of all television took place in Tommy Westphall's mind."

While we can't be certain that the "Back to the Future" trilogy takes place in Tommy's mind, we can be sure that, in the wake of Michael J. Fox's recent reappearance as Marty McFly, all three movies are making their Blu-Ray appearance today.

In the world of sports, the NBA season opens tonight. We'll be turning our attentions to Boston, where the traitorous LeBron James will be playing his first official game with the Miami Heat against the even-more-evil Celtics. We'll also be looking toward the Staples Center, where your world champion Los Angeles Lakers will be receiving their championship rings before hosting the Houston Rockets.

If that's too much basketball for you, you might consider a trip to Secaucus, New Jersey for a taste of Jewish culture at Kosherfest. (We assume the meat and dairy exhibits are kept in separate halls.)

Wednesday:

If Secaucus is just too darn far to travel, we suggest you snuggle up at home with a spud and some suds to commemorate both National Potato Day and American Beer Day, all while watching game one of the 2010 World Series, which begins tonight as the Texas Rangers travel to San Francisco's AT&T Park.

Thursday and Friday:

One team will win the Series and one will lose, but other winners and losers dominate the next two days.

In the former column, we find Edith Head, born on October 28, 1897. Head was the Hollywood costume designer par excellence, designing wardrobes for over 400 films, garnering 35 Oscar nominations and eight awards. But Ms. Head isn't our only winner today. The American people scored a win in 1886, when the Statue of Liberty was unveiled on what had been Bedloe’s Island, but has been called "Liberty Island" ever since.

Another winner is "The Sound of Music," the 1965 mega-musical that is (bafflingly to us) still staggeringly popular. In fact, adjusted for inflation, it’s still the third highest-grossing film of all time, having taken in the equivalent of more than $1.13 billion. So popular is it, in fact, that the cast will appear on Oprah Winfrey's show on Friday for a 45th anniversary reunion - including co-star Christopher Plummer, whose disparagement of the film as "The Sound of Mucous" is legendary.

Sort of stuck between "winner" and "loser" was Anton LaVey, who died October 29, 1997. LaVey was a writer and occultist who founded the Church of Satan, but the Church itself was less about "devil worship" than about the material world and the individual. We assume Mr. LaVey left plans for a suitable funeral, but, regardless, Saturday will be your own chance to think ahead, as it's Create a Great Funeral Day.

Firmly in the "loss" column is the tragedy that occurred due to the crash of the stock market on October 29, 1929, an event that plunged the planet into a Great Depression that only a world war was able to remedy.

Saturday:

The day before All-Hallow's Eve (aka "Devil's Night") gives us plenty of opportunities to celebrate. For example, it's the 72nd anniversary of Orson Welles and the Mercury Theatre's radio adaptation of H. G. Wells' "The War of the Worlds," a broadcast that scared the pants off a good portion of the country. Many who tuned in late became convinced that Martians had indeed invaded Earth and the end of the world was nigh. Given that Welles was famous for his ballyhoo, we wonder how much of the panic was hoped-for.

Speaking of fear, we know we'll be glued to the tube this morning to watch Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert hold their "Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear" on the National Mall in Washington. (And we'll finish the day by tuning into "Saturday Night Live" to watch Jon Hamm return once more to his hosting duties.)

Of course, the most terrifying prospect (unless you're a dentist) is the thought of all that candy tomorrow, accompanied by the prospect of toddlers hopped up on sugar. The antidote for this is a candy so horrid that no one would actually eat it. While the best solution is the worst of all candies (circus peanuts), the sweet in the number two position gets its turn in the spotlight today, National Candy Corn Day. Buy a big bag of the vile stuff and your kids will be begging for healthier treats.

Sunday:

Today is Halloween, which overshadows everything else, but there's still plenty more of interest.

For example, the San Francisco 49ers will take on the Denver Broncos in London's venerable Wembley Stadium to demonstrate American football to the Brits one more time. (Though the way the Niners have been playing so far this season, it could turn Wembley into a chamber of horrors.)

And since the dead will walk tomorrow, we note the anniversary of the body of the late Soviet leader Josef Stalin being moved in 1961 from its premium spot beside the preserved corpse of Lenin.

Two of our own personal favorites passed in this day. In 1925, French silent film comedian Max Linder committed suicide with his wife. At his peak in the 1910s, Linder was almost as famous and as popular as Charlie Chaplin. He turned out a series of droll comedies that contrasted with the adventures of Chaplin's "tramp" character by portraying a sharp urban sophisticate. Unfortunately, Linder's film career was interrupted by World War I, and the subsequent health and mental problems he suffered from his service led to his death.

On this day the following year, Harry Houdini died. Houdini was one of the greatest showmen of the Golden Age of Magic. While not the most skilled magician, he was unparalleled in giving his audience a full evening's entertainment, which included magic, escapes, and the exposure of fraudulent mediums. During his last week, Houdini suffered from appendicitis and fractured his ankle (and still performed his "Chinese Water Torture Cell" escape, which involved being suspended by his ankles) and  Despite a temperature of 104ºF and intense pain, he refused to be hospitalized until he collapsed on stage (and even then, he finished the show). After a week in Detroit's Grace Hospital, he died of peritonitis brought on by his ruptured appendix.

Somewhere between horror and entertainment lies the musical "The Scottsboro Boys," which opens on Broadway tonight. One of the final collaborations between writers John Kander and Fred Ebb (the latter of whom actually died in 2004), the musical tells the story of nine black Alabama teenagers who were unjustly accused of raping two white women in 1931. The case became a cause célèbre, sparking years of trials, appeals, retrials, and Supreme Court rulings, ultimately ending in a series of convictions, pardons, and acquittals.

After all that death and destruction, let's end the week on some lighter notes. For example, Halloween 1941 saw the completion of the sculpting of the faces on Mt. Rushmore. And today, in addition to being Halloween, is also, appropriately enough, National Knock-Knock Day, dedicated not only to those first jokes many of us learned, but also to the kids who'll be knocking on your door tonight - some of whom may well be collecting for UNICEF, since this is National UNICEF Day.

See you in November!

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World's Largest Drag Queen Goes Over Falls with Pumpkin Pie
By Dave Sikula
Mon, October 18, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Matisse's
Upside down? Right-side up?
Beats the hell out of us
It's quiet this week. As we look over our files, we see little of consequence. We assume folks are still getting into an autumnal mood, but we persevere and submit herewith our own events and commemorations of the week.

Monday:

We begin the week by noting it's a big one for Thomas Edison. On this date in 1878, his company made electricity available for household usage. In 1931, on this day, he died, and Thursday marks the 131st anniversary of the demonstration of his first light bulb at his laboratory in Menlo Park, New Jersey, now known as "Edison."

It's a notable week for other inventions, too. For example, in 1954, Texas Instruments introduced the transistor radio. Up until the '50s, radios were big bulky things, full of vacuum tubes and wires. With the invention of the transistor in 1947, it was suddenly possible to make radios, televisions, and pretty much anything electronic small and portable. The transistor radio came along just in time for post-war teenagers to carry rock and roll music anywhere, driving their parents and other adults crazy. And Friday will mark the anniversary of the creation of the first Xerox image in 1938. Before then, people actually had to write or type things on a sheet of paper to duplicate them. Now, plagiarism is only the push of a button away.

Speaking of "crazy," "The Talk" debuts on CBS today, featuring Sara Gilbert, Sharon Osbourne, Leah Remini, Julie Chen, Holly Robinson Peete, and Marissa Jaret Winokur in a show that's absolutely nothing like "The View." (We mention that it's also World Menopause Day - completely in passing ...)

While we've mentioned science, let's not forget art. In 1896, the world's first comic strip, "The Yellow Kid," debuted. It wasn't so much a "strip" as a daily cartoon featuring something outlandish in society that the otherwise-mute Kid would comment on with writing on his nighshirt. What he would have had to say about Henri Matisse's "Le Bateau," we can only imagine. It went on display at New York's Museum of Modern Art on this day in 1961 - and it wasn’t until 116, 000 viewers and 47 days had passed that someone noticed that the painting had been hanging upside down.

We finish by noting it's Alaska Day, commemorating the transfer of Alaska from Russia to the United States in 1867. (No jokes about seeing Russia from your house, please ...)

Tuesday:

Only two events of note today. One is the 1745 death of Jonathan Swift, the cleric, novelist, and satirist who gave us "Gulliver's Travels" (whence originated our corporate name) and "A Modest Proposal." One is tempted to hope he was eaten by cannibals, but, alas, he met his end via a stroke.

In 1945, Harris Glen Milstead was born in Baltimore. Glenn led an ordinary life until he met aspiring filmmaker John Waters, who cast him as "The Smoking Nun" in his film "Roman Candles," renaming him "Divine," the name he used the rest of his life. Divine was described by "People" magazine as the "Drag Queen of the Century" (though was there that much competition?) and spent the rest of his career going from one outlandish role to another in Waters' films before his untimely death at the age of 42.

Wednesday:

We have three seasonal events today that are absolutely appropriately for this time of year. In 1967, Roger Patterson and Robert Gimlin, took out their home-movie camera, photographed a guy in a gorilla suit, and claimed they’d filmed a Bigfoot. The veracity of the footage has been the subject of debate ever since, though we're prepared to say it's a fake.

In the otherwise-sleepy hamlet of Circleville, Ohio, the annual Circleville Pumpkin Show will begin its four-day run today. Since 1903, the festival has presented thousands of these flavorful squashes to an adoring public who come for the sculpting, bands, and beauty contests, but who stay for the World’s Largest Pumpkin Pie, baked fresh every year by Lindsey’s Bake Shop.

In 1882, Bela Blasko was born in Lugos, Romania. At 12, the stage-struck Bela dropped out of school, became an actor, and changed his last name to Lugosi. As Bela Lugosi, he was a matinee idol in his own country, before coming to America in 1921. He worked as a laborer and occasional actor until 1927, when his continental good looks and accent made him a natural for the title role in the Broadway production of “Dracula." While the play was a smash hit, and led to a Hollywood contract, his accent baffled casting directors, who could see him only as a romantic vampire, and he was soon type-cast in horror films. Despite some occasional “straight” roles (most notably in 1938’s "Ninotchka," his career quickly headed to not-very-good parts in B-pictures, usually parodying his image. He always gave his utmost, even when the material was sub-par, as in his final films with Ed Wood, Hollywood’s worst director. He died of a heart attack in 1956.

Thursday:

More unrelated (but still interesting) events for the day:

In 1849, the first tattooed man to be put on public exhibit, James F. O’Connel, was put on display at the Franklin Theatre in New York City. Not sure what more can be added to that.

Except perhaps noting that today is Reptile Awareness Day, so we encourage you to go out and be aware of some reptiles -- perhaps while enjoying a big plate of nachos, since it’s also the International Day of the Nacho.

Friday:

When we compile these lists, we’re overwhelmed with celebrations of "National This Day" and "International That Week," so imagine our surprise and disappointment when we discovered that one of our sources lists October 22 with this note: “There are no holiday events on record for this day,” Is it possible that only one day out of 365 is bereft of some kind of celebration? It may be true, though (alas!), as the only other events of note we could find are the 107th birthday of Stooge Jerome "Curly" Howard, and the fact that it’s International Stuttering Awareness Day.

Curly is probably the most popular of all the Stooges, combining a unique physical and vocal style into a characterization that was breathtakingly bold in the 1930s and has been a boon to adolescent boys (of all ages) in the decades since.

Saturday:

Looking for something fun to do today? We have three suggestions.

1) Celebrate the 80th anniversary of the world’s first miniature golf tournament in Chattanooga, Tennessee. The tournament was won by J.K. Scott, though the record neglects to state whether he was better shooting through the windmill or the castle.

2) If you’re near Oklahoma City, you might join the Ghouls Gone Wild celebration headlined by The Flaming Lips and participate in their annual March of 1000 Flaming Skeletons. Be warned, though, you’ve got to handle a live torch - and those costumes can be flammable.

3) You can celebrate Mole Day. The “Mole” is a method of counting the Avogadro number - 6.02 x 10 to the 23rd power of anything. Amodeo Avogadro discovered that the number of molecules in a mole is the same for all substances, which allows chemists are able to precisely measure quantities of chemicals in the lab. Mole Day is intended to help everyone become enthusiastic about chemistry. If you understood a word of that, the first two events may be too strenuous for you, so our advice is to stick with the chemistry.

Sunday:

To finish off the week, we’ll note the near-irony of it being the Feast of Good & Plenty, because yes, we had a number of good events this week, but not plenty of them.

It’s also World Origami Day, which somehow runs through November 11 (must be that those origami artists are able to fold time and space, as well as paper).

Speaking of folding, we also have to mention that, on this day in 1901, Annie Edson Taylor became the first person to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel. How she didn’t end up folded herself is one of the miracles of the age - especially considering she did it to celebrate her 63rd birthday. She’d sent her cat over the falls in her specially-padded barrel the day before, and when the feline emerged unscathed, she figured it was safe enough for her. Mrs. Taylor suffered a cut on her head, but was otherwise unharmed, though she did tell the press, "If it was with my dying breath, I would caution anyone against attempting the feat. I would sooner walk up to the mouth of a cannon, knowing it was going to blow me to pieces than make another trip over the Falls."

If all the above sounds like a lot of baloney, we merely note the appropriateness of today being National Bologna Day, and leave you make up your own mind.

See you next time!

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We Cannot Tell a Lie; It's the Best Spark Ever
By Dave Sikula
Mon, October 11, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie as Jeeves and Bertie Wooster
"I say, Jeeves; this 'Spark' thing is a bit of
a rum go, isn't it?" "Actually, sir, I believe
it's a rather useful compendium of Internet
links." "Nonsense, Jeeves; there's nothing
useful on the Internet."
Now that it's officially autumn (in the Northern Hemisphere, anyway), events seem to be calming down as we prepare for the long winter hibernation. But don't think for a minute that nothing's going on. For example:

Monday:

In 1759, Mason Weems was born. Although he studied theology and became a parson in the Episcopal Church, we remember him best for his 1800 "History of the Life and Death, Virtues and Exploits of General George Washington." The book was less a biography than a collection of exaggerations and falsehoods -- most notably the story of six-year-old George cutting down one of his father's cherry trees,then confessing to the crime. The book was popular in its time, but has been debunked in the centuries since.

It's a day to celebrate politicians, such as the 126th birthday of Eleanor Roosevelt. Mrs. Roosevelt was the wife of Franklin D. Roosevelt, and the first lady of the land for some 12 years, During her time in the White House, she fought tirelessly for liberal causes and human rights, continuing her work after her husband's death, as both a United States delegate to the United Nations, and as chair of the U.N. Commission on Human Rights. Not that she couldn't have fun, or take time out to appear on quiz shows or to hawk margarine on television.

And it's the 35th wedding anniversary of Bill and Hillary Rodham Clinton. (Hint to Bill: the 35th is the coral or jade anniversary). Little did the Clintons know that their wedding night would coincide with the premiere of "Saturday Night Live," a program that would, in the decades to come, poke endless fun at both of them.

Remember last week when we were all aquiver over the Nobel Prizes being announced? Well, the festivities conclude today with the announcement of the winner of the Prize for Economics. Economics being an inexact science, this is the only one of the prizes not founded by Alfred Nobel, having been established by the Bank of Sweden in 1969.

What better way to celebrate winning a Nobel than by having a huge Thanksgiving feast? Think it's too early for Thanksgiving? Not if you're in Canada, where today is Turkey Day, thanks to their earlier harvests. And leftover turkey makes a great sandwich, perfect for National School Lunch Week, which begins today.

Finally, and more seriously, in light of the recent "It Gets Better" project, we note that today is National Coming Out Day, on which we celebrate our lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered friends and family members and their fight for equality. Sadly, tomorrow is the 12th anniversary the death of Matthew Shepard, who was tortured to death solely for being gay.

Tuesday:

Not so interested in equality was the Roman emperor Nero, who ascended to the throne on this day in 54. While Nero was, by all accounts, a tyrant and a dictator, he is likely best known for the apocryphal scenes of him fiddling or playing the lyre while Rome burned in a fire that destroyed a good portion of the city – a tale that's as false as the one about Washington and the cherry tree -- or the myths that Paul McCartney suffered a premature death.

The "Paul is Dead" craze began when a group of Drake University students uncovered a series of "clues" they thought had been planted by the Beatles to indicate McCartney had died. On this day in 1969, they persuaded WKNR DJ Russ Gibb to play "Revolution #9" backward in order to reveal its supposedly masked message of "Turn me on, dead man."

Some notable TV anniversaries today. Most important to us is the 1950 premiere of "The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show." While Burns and Allen were one of the top acts in vaudeville, movies, and radio, their television show was their most important contribution to show business. Decades ahead of its time, the show featured such innovations as George talking directly to the audience about the plot of the episode (which he generally found out about by watching the program -- as it was taking place -- on the television in his den, and replacing actors in mid-scene with other actors playing the same part. All of it was highlighted by Gracie's unique form of humor, which combined a lovable dimness with an inability to see beyond the literal meanings of words.

In 1953, "The Bob Hope Show" began its 20-year run on NBC, as America's favorite comedian traded quips and appeared in skits with the country’s top movie stars, athletes, and personalities.

1978 saw the premiere of "Sneak Previews," the first national iteration of the many shows featuring film critics Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert battling each other over which movies were any good. Those that were were awarded the coveted "two thumbs up" rating. Those that weren’t were usually greeted by Aroma the Educated Skunk or Spot the Wonder Dog, who highlighted the "stinker" or "dog" of the week.

We can assume that such a dismal fate would not await either the nominees for the Man Booker Prize, awarded each year to the best English-language novel written by a citizen of the British Commonwealth (the winner of which will be announced today), or those hoping for a National Book Award, the finalists for which will be announced tomorrow.

Those who are afraid they won’t get either a nomination or an award can take comfort in knowing that tomorrow is National Face Your Fears Day. Buck up and wait till next year!

You’d think a holiday would be anything but controversial, but today is Columbus Day (even if the banks were closed yesterday), and the "discoverer of America" is anything but universally hailed, especially by Native American groups.

Wednesday:

Only three events of note today, but none of them are without interest.

First of all, today is the 235th anniversary of the founding of the United States Navy.

It's also National Bring Your Teddy Bear to Work Day, in the hopes that having a stuffed friend nearby will relieve some of your workplace stress.

And speaking of stress, it was four years ago today that the Six Flags theme park in Gurnee, Illinois held a live cockroach eating contest. If only they'd waiting until the 14th, they could have made the competition part of National Chocolate Covered Insect Day or even National Dessert Day. Yum!

Thursday:

We mentioned that last week was the anniversary of the start of the carving of Mount Rushmore, and we have to wonder, given today's anniversary, whether Theodore Roosevelt could have done all the sculpting by himself, using only his bare hands. Why? On this date in 1912, while campaigning in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Roosevelt was shot at point blank range. Fortunately, a metal glasses case and the speech he was supposed to deliver was folded in his breast pocket and took most of the impact. Even with a fresh flesh wound and the bullet still in him, TR still delivered the speech. They don't make 'em like that anymore.

Speaking of unique individuals, today is the birthday of actress Lillian Gish. Born in 1893, Miss Gish began her film career in 1912, working with pioneering director D.W. Griffith, and kept working until 1987’s "The Whales of August." Her career spanned virtually the entire history of cinema. While it might seem impossible that one woman could have been in both 1915’s "The Birth of a Nation" and an episode of "The Love Boat" 65 years later, Miss Gish did it!

Miss Gish even did live TV (there was no other kind in the 1950s, after all), and NBC's "30 Rock" will revive that artform tonight, with a special live episode from Rockefeller Center’s Studio 8H, normally the home of "Saturday Night Live."

As unique as Theodore Roosevelt, Lillian Gish, and live television is "Winnie-the-Pooh," the children’s classic by A.A. Milne, first published on this day in 1926.

Friday:

Speaking of characters, we note quite a few of them today. For example, Grace Bedell,  the eleven-year-old girl who wrote Abraham Lincoln on this date in 1860, suggesting that he grow a beard because "all the ladies like whiskers and they would tease their husbands to vote for you and then you would be President." Whether or not Lincoln took the advice seriously, he did start growing a beard within a month and was indeed elected.

Then there's P.G. Wodehouse, born in 1881. Wodehouse wrote some of the funniest novels ever penned (many of which featured the hopelessly dim Bertie Wooster and his invaluable valet, Jeeves) and was also a talented songwriter, who worked with composer Jerome Kern to, more or less, create the American musical.

And let us not forget Jack the Ripper (there's a transition!), who in 1888, sent his letter "From Hell" to the police investigating his murders.

Speaking of death, superspy Mata Hari met hers on this day in 1917. Even though she had lured many a man to his doom during World War I, she met her own end before a firing squad.

Of course, the entire world nearly met its end in 1962, as the Cuban Missile Crisis began. The Soviet Union had deployed nuclear missiles in Cuba, only 90 miles from the Florida coast, and the whole world held its breath as U.S. President John F. Kennedy and Soviet Premier Nikita Khrushchev went toe-to-toe, daring each other to blink first. Khrushchev ultimately conceded, removing the missiles after two weeks.

But it's not all gloom and doom today (even if today is National Grouch Day and tomorrow is National Boss Day -- are they inseparable?). It’s the anniversary of the 1951 premiere of "I Love Lucy," the sitcom that soon became the nation's favorite program and has aired continually ever since, thanks in large part to star and producer Desi Arnaz. In the early days of television, comedies were either aired live and lost forever, or syndicated using a kinescope (that is, by placing a camera in front of a monitor and filming the live broadcast). Arnaz had the idea of filming the show with three cameras before a live audience, treating the whole thing as a small movie -- a technique used to this day.

Of today’s last two events, one is unnecessary and the other is most necessary. The unnecessary one is Global Handwashing Day, which has the goal of encouraging everyone to wash their hands using soap and water to prevent the spread of disease. We know all our readers wash their hands -- especially after using the bathroom -- so there’s no need for the notice, right?

The necessary event is National Mammography Day, on which all women over 40 -- and those at risk -- are urged to schedule a mammogram in the hopes of detecting any early signs of breast cancer.

Saturday and Sunday:

Saturday is Dictionary Day, dedicated to that book with all the answers -- or, at least, with all the definitions. Why? Because, in 1758, Noah Webster, the man whose name has become synonymous (adj., "Having the same or a similar meaning" or "equivalent in connotation") with the idea of defining words, was born.

It’s also the birthday of two of the greatest playwrights in world history -- though they couldn't have been more different. 1854 saw the birth of Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde. Wilde wrote with a flamboyance and genius that has seldom been equaled. His plays, such as "The Importance of Being Earnest" and "Lady Windermere’s Fan," bristle with wit. Unfortunately, his homosexuality was anathema to Victorian English society, and he was sentenced to two years at hard labor, which broke both his body and his spirit. He died in exile in Paris in 1900.

In 1888, Eugene O’Neill was born. The son of one of America's finest actors, James O’Neill, Eugene was drawn to the theatre from his youth. After stints as a merchant seaman and in a tuberculosis sanatorium, he began writing plays that were generally experimental, theatrical, and tragic. His final plays, including "A Moon for the Misbegotten" and "The Iceman Cometh," are towering achievements, but both are surpassed by "Long Day’s Journey into Night," a portrait of his family that is simultaneously horrific, lacerating, forgiving, tragic, and comedic. He was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1936, and died in 1953.

Actress Angela Lansbury turns 85 today. Lansbury began her film career at the age of 17 and hasn't stopped working since. While most audiences know her as mystery novelist Jessica Fletcher on "Murder, She Wrote," she is widely considered to be the first lady of the American stage, whose work in such musicals as "Mame" and "Sweeney Todd" have earned her seven Tony Award nominations and five awards, not to mention multiple nominations for the Academy Awards (three), the Golden Globes (15), and the Emmys (18).

No doubt our good friends at the Ultimate Fighting Championship will note Miss Lansbury's birthday with tonight's UFC 120 in London, as will the folks who urge you to protect and improve the lives of cats around the country on National Feral Cat Day.

If you'd like to raise your own glass to her, we urge you to cook up a mess of noodles to accompany it, since tomorrow is National Pasta Day. If you don't have the urge to cook, you might want to pass on a quick burger and join others who are noting World Anti-McDonald’s Day. We'd never do that, personally -- the fries are just too darn good -- but we appreciate the sentiment.

However you celebrate, don't overdo it, or you won't be able to join us next time. See you then!

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Ask a Stupid Question, You Get a Spark Like This One
By Dave Sikula
Mon, September 27, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

George
"Hey! Shouldn't you be gettin' back
to work or somethin'?
Greetings once again from The Spark. We don't know about you, but last week's epic nearly killed us in the writing, so this week's will be shorter, and, we hope, sweeter.

Monday:

Let's begin by noting that it's Ask a Stupid Question Day, created by teachers to let their students ask away without fear of mockery. We agree that the idea is a good one, for those questions may well lead to good answers, though probably not as good as the one Albert Einstein asked in 1905, when the physics journal "Annalen der Physik" published his paper "Does the Inertia of a Body Depend Upon Its Energy Content?" and got the answered "E=mc²." We’re not claiming to understand either the question or the answer, but physicists sure did.

That wasn't the only question answered on this day, though. In 1822, French linguist Jean-Francois Champollion announced that he had deciphered the Rosetta Stone. For those unwilling to ask, it’s an engraved slab that had been discovered in 1799 in Rashid (or Rosetta), Egypt, and combined ancient hieroglyphics with Egyptian and Greek letters. Champollion’s deciphering of the text gave archaeologists their first real means to interpret ancient pictographs. It’s been on display in the British Museum since 1802, and is the most-visited object in that institution to this day.

If you're still interested in trivia, we point you to the small town of Lancaster, PA. In 1777, it was the capital of the United States -- but for only one day. Speaking of the capital reminds us of politics, which reminds us of cartoonist Thomas Nast, born on this day in 1840. Nast was, among other things, the man who gave us the Republican elephant, the Democratic donkey, Uncle Sam, and the modern depiction of Santa Claus.

Not so jolly was Henry Ford. In 1908, Ford’s first Model T rolled off the assembly line. The automobile went on sale Oct. 1 for $825 (just under $20,000 in modern currency), but soon became a national sensation, opening up personal transportation for the masses. By 1925, Ford's assembly line technique had become so efficient, that the price of the car had dropped to $265 -- or just over $3,000 today).

Turning to television, we see that today is not only the 56th anniversary of "Tonight!" -- which soon became "The Tonight Show" hosted by Steve Allen (and today is the 90th birthday of Steve's widow, Jayne Meadows), we also see that coming up on the October 1st is the 48th anniversary of Johnny Carson taking over the "Tonight" host's chair he'd occupy for the next 29 years. Unfortunately, NBC, not sensing any historical value in the show, erased most of the tapes of the show's early years. In fact, it's only in the last couple of weeks that the audio track of the first three minutes of Carson's first show surfaced after decades of being lost. (Unfortunately, the video is still missing.) "Tonight" was a real gamble on the part of NBC executive Sylvester "Pat" Weaver (father of Sigourney Weaver, by the way), in that no one knew if anyone would stay up into the wee hours to watch TV. I think we know the answer to that particular question nowadays ... (For those who need help, though, it is National Coffee Day.)

We see that the new season of "Sesame Street" begins today, but we assume we won't be seeing any sign of Katy Perry.

Tuesday:

In 1901, Ed Sullivan was born. Sullivan came to fame in the 1920s and '30s covering Broadway and Hollywood gossip (not to mention his bitter feuds with rival columnist Walter Winchell). From 1948 to 1971, though, he became in integral part of American culture by hosting a weekly variety show that featured singers, plate spinners, ventriloquists, comedians, and everything in between in an attempt to entertain every part of the audience.

Variety shows like Sullivan's have all but disappeared from the airwaves, but there's one that began decades before his program and continues to the present day -- this day especially, as, following the tragic floods in Tennessee this spring, the Grand Ole Opry will return to its home to continue its 85-year tradition of broadcasting the finest in country music.

That's not the only show tonight, though. On PBS, Ken Burns's "The Tenth Inning" premieres, continuing his 1994 series on the history of baseball. Ironically, the show airs on the 90th anniversary of one of the game's greatest scandals: the indictment of eight members of the Chicago White Sox, who were accused of throwing the 1919 World Series to the Cincinnati Reds.

Gambling itself may be a disease, but it’s not one that can be cured with antibiotics, like penicillin, which Alexander Fleming discovered on this day in 1928. Dr. Fleming noticed that one of the molds in his lab was killing bacteria. Within months, he had released it to the world, giving doctors an irreplaceable tool in the treating of disease. (Speaking of gambling, we’d like to think we could win a bet that the transition into that paragraph was one of the most awkward ever.)

Wednesday:

On the docket today: the 110th birthday of singing cowboy Gene Autry. Autry had worked as a ranch hand in his youth, but realized his future lay in entertainment. By 1928, he was singing on the radio; by 1929, he was making records; and by 1934, he was making movies. The pictures were cheaply made, but from 1936 to 1954 (with time out for service in World War II), he was one of the top-grossing stars in Hollywood. He was able to parlay his screen fame into a broadcasting empire and ownership of the (then) California Angels. When he died in 1998 (a mere three days after turning 91), he was one of the wealthiest men in America and remains the only person with five stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

Thursday:

You ever played with a Frisbee? Of course you have -- well, either a Frisbee or a generic flying plastic disc. In 1958, the Wham-O company patented the toy. It, which was originally named the "Pluto Platter," but got its present name with Wham-O executive heard that Boston college kids (who were used to sailing pie plates from the local Frisbie Pie Company) were calling the platters "frisbies," and the rest is marketing history.

We don't believe they had Frisbees in Bedrock (after all, everything in that town is made of rock, which doesn’t tend to sail real well), but if they did, we would have found out about them starting 50 years ago tonight, when "The Flintstones" premiered in prime time on ABC.

While the Frisbee and "The Flintstones" were good ideas, tonight is the chance to celebrate not-so-good ideas, as the annual Ig Nobel Prizes will be awarded for discoveries "that cannot, or should not, be reproduced." In other words, they're the gold standard for bad ideas.

In 1954, singer and actress Julie Andrews made her Broadway debut, starring in the musical "The Boy Friend," the day before she turned 19. (She, of course, turns 75 tomorrow.)

On a sadder note, it was on this day in 1955, that actor James Dean was killed in a car crash. Dean had made only a few films (though he'd made numerous appearances on live television dramas), but his personality and acting style influenced and impacted a generation of Americans and actors.

Friday:

Beginnings and endings today:

In 1890, both Yosemite National Park and Yellowstone National Park were established by the U.S. Congress.

In 1957, the words "In God We Trust" made their first appearance on U.S. paper currency. (Frankly, we were surprised it was so late in American history.)

In 1968, George A. Romero's "Night of the Living Dead" opened, beginning a cycle that has subjected audiences to an endless series of zombie and vampire movies. Talk about not dying!

For those who can't get enough Disney (in which number we do not include ourselves), in 1971, Walt Disney World opened in Orlando, FL, followed in 1982 by the EPCOT Center. EPCOT, which is an acronym for “Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow” was intended by Uncle Walt to be a testing ground for new and innovative domestic theories and products, soon turned into just another tourist trap. Oh, well; the best-laid plans of mice ...

On the same day that EPCOT opened, Sony introduced their first compact disc player (the CDP-101, which looks about as big as a Buick). While nowadays, the CD is just about as dead as vinyl, it was, in its time, beyond ultra-modern.

The farewell is from Babe Ruth. Ruth's name has come to be synonymous with baseball, and while his hitting prowess speaks for itself, he’d be a Hall of Famer for his pitching alone. He was one of the greatest left-handers of all time, winning almost 100 games in his career. In 1933, he made his final appearance on the mound, beating his former team, the Boston Red Sox, 6-5. He pitched all nine innings, giving up twelve hits (no strikeouts), and hitting a homer.

Finally, today is International Raccoon Appreciation Day. If only it were Weasel Appreciation Day, we could feel sorry for Tony Hayward, who's stepping down as the head of BP.

Saturday:

Today's birthdays include three of the greatest comedians in showbiz history. First is Groucho Marx (1890), the most verbose of the Marx Brothers, who turned insults and wisecracks into an art form. Second is Bud Abbott (1895), who partnered for years with Lou Costello, and who is generally considered the greatest straight man of all time. Last is George "Spanky" McFarland, the child actor who became the leader of the kid group known as either "Our Gang" and "The Little Rascals."

Two other birthdays are of men who couldn't be more different. 1452 saw the birth of England's King Richard III. Shakespeare painted Richard as a manipulator who lied and murdered his way to the throne, but recent reappraisals have called him either benevolent or, at worst, benign. The other is Mohandas Gandhi (1869), better known as Mahatma Gandhi, whose nonviolent policies led to the independence of India from the British Empire.

In that period of history (the late 19th century), that empire spanned the globe, so that it was the perfect atmosphere for the fictional Phileas Fogg to make his 1872 wager that he could travel around the world in eighty days. Fogg used almost every means of transportation available to him in those less-advanced times, except a hot-air balloon, which makes this week's International Balloon Fiesta in Albuquerque, NM, slightly ironic.

Three anniversaries that we've tried to link, but just can't: In 1919, President Woodrow Wilson suffered a massive stroke, which left him partially paralyzed and unable to fulfill his duties, so until his recovery, the country was basically run by his wife Edith.
Charles M. Schulz's comic strip "Peanuts" began running. Schulz ended the strip in 2000, and in an odd twist of fate, died the day before the last Sunday page ran.

Finally in 1959, "The Twilight Zone" premiered. Even though it ran only five seasons, it's still the gold standard for creepy television, and its guitar-riff theme song, which signifies something odd happening, is known to even those who never saw the show.

Sunday:

Let's begin the end of the week by wishing Barack and Michelle Obama a happy 18th wedding anniversary. (And just to remind you, Mr. President, porcelain is the traditional gift.)

Like the "Odd Couple" juxtaposition of Gandhi and Richard above, today's pairing is just as jarring. In 1873, Emily Post was born. She devoted her life to the gospels of etiquette and good manners. On the other hand, we have Harvey Kurtzman, born in 1902. Kurtzman gave us, among other things, Mad Magazine (the original, funny version), and his sense of humor has influenced pretty much everyone from the Pythons to the writers of the National Lampoon (again, the original, funny version), who went on to create or inspire everything from "Animal House" to "Saturday Night Live," and even David Letterman. By extension, Kurtzman influenced almost every American comedian and comedy movie of the second half of the Twentieth Century.

There are exceptions, though, such as "The Andy Griffith Show," which premiered in 1960, or "The Dick Van Dyke Show" (1961). The contrast of the two shows, with their respective rural and urban perspectives, set the standards for television comedies for the next ten years, even if they were neither particularly satirical nor Kurtzmanesque.

We'll close the week by mentioning that it’s the 15th anniversary of O.J. Simpson being acquitted of the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman, and then pausing while you say, "That's fifteen years ago? Wow."

See you next time!

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