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"Ceci N'est Pas une Pipe" ... It's a Spark
By Dave Sikula
Fri, November 19, 2010, 12:01 am PST

Rene Magritte's
This may not be a pipe, but it
is the illustration for a Spark
Two events earlier this week couldn't help but remind us of their historical precedents. First, the engagement of Prince William and Kate Middleton made us remember that Friday is the 63rd wedding anniversary of his grandparents, Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip. If you were thinking of sending Liz and Phil a present, it's probably not necessary; they're managing to squeeze by, even in this tight economy.

Tuesday's groundbreaking for the George W. Bush Presidential Center at Southern Methodist University in Dallas made us think of November 19, 1939, when Franklin D. Roosevelt laid the cornerstone for the FDR Library and Museum in Hyde Park, New York, on the grounds of the Roosevelt family estate. It was America's first official presidential library. Until then, executive papers were either distributed to the President's families, given to the National Archives, or tossed away. The result was a mess that plagued historians. For example, there are numerous drafts and handwritten copies of Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address, all of which differ slightly, so that today it's unclear exactly what he said on November 19, 1863, when he delivered the speech to mixed reviews. Democratic newspapers panned it as "silly, flat, and dishwatery," and Republican papers called it "tasteful and elegant." You pays yer money and you takes yer choice, we guess. (Good thing there isn't that kind of partisanship today ...)

Speaking of "paying yer money," we're guessing that more than a few people will be doing just that at the movies this weekend, as the first part of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" opens. We don't know if folks will be lining up for that, or to see the trailer for next summer's Green Lantern" movie, but we're willing to bet that there'll be some who are more interested in space opera than in teenage wizards.

"Green Lantern" is a movie about an interstellar police force. We don't know if their home planet of Oa (or even Mogo, the Green Lantern who is a sentient planet) would be visible using the Hubble Space Telescope, but we do know that Saturday would have been the 121st birthday of Edwin Hubble, the astronomer for whom the telescope is named, and is the 26th anniversary of the founding of the SETI Institute, which searches for extraterrestrial life.

Whether there's anyone else out there is a mystery that SETI is dedicated to solving, but that riddle pales in comparison to the one that gripped America over the summer and fall of 1980, when the country wondered who shot J.R. Ewing. Sunday is the 30th anniversary of the episode of "Dallas" that solved that mystery. It was estimated that 83 million people were tuned in that night, which is still the third-largest TV audience ever. Appropriately, Sunday is also World Television Day, dedicated to the boob tube and all its splendors. (It's also World Hello Day, during which you're supposed to say "Hello" to ten people. But if you're watching television, you probably won't get the chance. Of course, if you've spent Saturday night watching UFC 123 from Auburn Hills, Michigan, and Sunday afternoon watching the NASCAR Ford 400 from the Miami Homestead Speedway, you may be ready to get off the couch and socialize.

Crazed from too much TV? You might try sending birthday greetings to Belgian artist René Magritte. He was born on November 21, 1889, and died in 1967, but his art is so surreal - with trains rushing from fireplaces and apples replacing human heads - that he might appreciate the good wishes anyway. If you're still desperate to make a human connection, you can wish a happy 45th to Bjork, the surrealist Icelandic singer and swan fancier.

We close with week with two holidays: Sunday is Universal Children's Day, created by the United Nations in 1954 to encourage work that benefits and promotes the welfare of the children of the world, and Friday is World Toilet Day, which sounds funny, but promotes clean and sanitary conditions for everyone, child and adult. We are reminded on this day that a straight flush beats a full house.

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There Are Some Things You Just Can't Get Away From
By Dave Sikula
Mon, November 8, 2010, 12:01 am PST

The Mona Lisa hanging in the Louvre
Quite possibly the worst photo
ever taken of the Mona Lisa
(Taken by the author in 2009.)
A new week presents new opportunities, new challenges, and new events to note. Let's begin, shall we?

Monday:

Last week we mentioned that Wednesday was anniversary of Leonardo da Vinci commission to paint the portrait that became known as the Mona Lisa. Well, today is the anniversary of the museum that is the painting's home. In 1793, the French government opened the Louvre to the public as a museum. Built as a fortress in the 12th century and gradually converted into a palace, following the French Revolution, it eventually became the most-visited art museum in the world (approximately 8.5 million visitors a year), with a collection of nearly 400,000 items - ranging from ancient Egyptian antiquities to 19th-century masterpieces– of which only 35,000 are on display at any one time.

Our birthday of note today is that of Edmond Halley, born in 1656. Halley (pronounced "Holly," not "Hal-ee," or "Hailey") was the English astronomer who realized that not only were the various celestial objects that had visited the earth since 466 BCE actually only one comet, but also that the comet was in such an orbit that it would return like clockwork every 76 years. In 1705, Halley predicted that the comet would return in 1758 – which it did. Unfortunately, Halley never actually saw his prediction confirmed, as he died in 1742.

Speaking of deaths, we note the 1965 passing of newspaper columnist Dorothy Kilgallen. Kilgallen was nationally known for her "Voice of Broadway" column in New York's "Journal-American" as well as her weekly appearances on the "What's My Line?" game show. Always political, she became obsessed with the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, doing extensive interviews and investigations, and coming to the conclusion that there had been a massive cover-up of the murder. She claimed to have evidence that would blow the lid off the case, but was found dead in her apartment under very mysterious circumstances. Apparently healthy only hours before, she was found sitting in bed in a bedroom she never used, fully made-up and dressed, with a book she had finished weeks earlier by her side, and her reading glasses nowhere nearby. Her husband claimed she had come home at midnight, but eyewitnesses had seen her out on the town as late as 2 a.m. All her research on the assassination had mysteriously vanished. The official verdict said that her death was due to either a heart attack or a drug overdose, but we have our suspicions.

In happier news, Conan O'Brien will make his TBS debut tonight, with his new talk show, the eponymously-titled "Conan." We should probably make the nearly-obligatory joke about the barbarian of the same name, but haven't those been done to death?

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It's a Scandal! It's a Outrage!
By Dave Sikula
Fri, November 5, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Close-up of a Monopoly board
I'll trade you two railroads
and the waterworks for
Ventor Ave. and Oriental
(Photo by Andrea Allen)
Friday:

We note the death of three show business giants today. First is George M. Cohan, who died in 1942. Cohan was the first Broadway star of the modern age, a quadruple-threat who acted, wrote, composed, and produced scores of plays and musicals. Unlike the energetically over-the-top Oscar-winning portrayal of him by James Cagney in "Yankee Doodle Dandy," Cohan's actual on-stage style was simple, warm, and intimate, contrasting sharply with the bombast of most other performers of the time.

In 1956, pianist Art Tatum died at the age of 47. Despite his near-blindness, Tatum was certainly the greatest jazz pianist who ever lived, if not the greatest musician, period. His dazzling runs and breathtaking virtuosity have never been equaled. Vladimir Horowitz, no mean piano player himself, was in awe upon hearing Tatum's unrivaled technique and improvisational skills, saying that if Tatum ever took up classical music, he'd quit the next day.

This day in 1960 saw the passing of Mack Sennett. In the 1910s and '20s, Sennett's film comedies were unsurpassed. He had a flawless eye for talent, discovering (among others) Harold Lloyd, Gloria Swanson, Roscoe Arbuckle, Marie Dressler, Mabel Normand, Ben Turpin, and Harry Langdon. Unfortunately, Sennett's vision did not include business acumen, and his career began a slow decline with the coming of sound in the late 1920s. He mostly retired in the mid-'30s, but spent the final quarter-century of his life making occasional cameos in other people's comedies and announcing projects that never quite got off the ground. His Keystone comedies remain the gold standard for early silent comedy.

Sennett retired in 1935, but we don't know if he ever played Monopoly, the board game that was introduced by Parker Brothers on this day in that year.

All this talk of movies has made us wonder just what’s opening today, and it’s actually a fair bunch of films (none of which are summer blockbusters, indicating it's probably the start of awards season). For example, there’s "Fair Game," starring Naomi Watts as exposed CIA agent Valerie Plame and Sean Penn as her husband Joseph Wilson; "For Colored Girls," directed by the ubiquitous Tyler Perry, and starring Janet Jackson; "Megamind," an animated superhero comedy starring the voices of Will Ferrell, Brad Pitt, and Tina Fey; "127 Hours," with James Franco as hiker Aron Ralston, who was forced to amputate his own arm when it became trapped under a boulder; and "Client 9," a documentary about former New York governor Eliot Spitzer.

If motion pictures don't appeal to you, you might travel to England, to celebrate Guy Fawkes Night, which commemorates the 16th century plot to blow up the Houses of Parliament by burning scarecrow effigies of the "Gunpowder Plot's" alleged ringleader.

Saturday and Sunday:

Saturdays in the fall are college football day, and this is the anniversary of the day in 1869 when Princeton University (then known as the College of New Jersey) traveled to Rutgers College to play the first intercollegiate football game. (Rutgers won, 6-4.)

What more appropriate way to celebrate that anniversary than by watching a modern college football game? Perhaps you could make it better by watching that game in Forest Grove, Oregon (fifteen miles west of Portland) and indulging in the Verboort Sausage and Kraut Dinner. And then throw in some delicious nachos as a part of National Nachos Day. With all the resulting wind you'll be producing, you could pick up your saxophone and blow a tune; after all it is the 196th birthday of Antoine-Joseph (Adolphe) Sax, the inventor of both the saxophone and saxotromba, and hence, Saxophone Day.

Two more birthdays of note today. Thomas Ince (1882), who in a brief 14-year career, wrote, directed, produced, or acted in nearly 200 movies, and provided the fodder for one of Hollywood's first big scandals when he met his death on board the yacht of newspaper magnate William Randolph Hearst. While the official story was that Ince died of heart trouble (at the age of 42), rumors have persisted that Hearst shot and killed Ince over the latter’s undue interest in Hearst’s mistress, Marion Davies. (This incident supposedly led to the long career of gossip columnist Louella Parsons, who was a witness to the alleged crime and given a lifetime contract to shut her up.)

In 1892, Harold Ross was born in Aspen, Colorado. After working in his teen years on various newspapers and serving as an editor on the Army’s paper "Stars and Stripes" during World War I, he settled in New York, founding and editing "The New Yorker" in 1925. For the last 85 years, it's been the gold standard of American magazines, hailed for its in-depth reportage, fiction, and cartoons.

Had Ross been near a television (still a relatively new invention) on his 55th birthday in 1947, he could have watched the inaugural broadcast of "Meet the Press," which began its reign as the longest-running television show in the world that day. After 63 years, the show can still make news, unlike Sunday's big event, the end of daylight saving time.

In spite of the fact that daylight saving ends every year, for reasons we'll never be able to figure, our evening commute home is always plagued with bumper-to-bumper traffic as people apparently forget how to drive in the dark. Since we expect traffic to be bad, we'd better take off now.

See you next time!

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World's Largest Drag Queen Goes Over Falls with Pumpkin Pie
By Dave Sikula
Mon, October 18, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Matisse's
Upside down? Right-side up?
Beats the hell out of us
It's quiet this week. As we look over our files, we see little of consequence. We assume folks are still getting into an autumnal mood, but we persevere and submit herewith our own events and commemorations of the week.

Monday:

We begin the week by noting it's a big one for Thomas Edison. On this date in 1878, his company made electricity available for household usage. In 1931, on this day, he died, and Thursday marks the 131st anniversary of the demonstration of his first light bulb at his laboratory in Menlo Park, New Jersey, now known as "Edison."

It's a notable week for other inventions, too. For example, in 1954, Texas Instruments introduced the transistor radio. Up until the '50s, radios were big bulky things, full of vacuum tubes and wires. With the invention of the transistor in 1947, it was suddenly possible to make radios, televisions, and pretty much anything electronic small and portable. The transistor radio came along just in time for post-war teenagers to carry rock and roll music anywhere, driving their parents and other adults crazy. And Friday will mark the anniversary of the creation of the first Xerox image in 1938. Before then, people actually had to write or type things on a sheet of paper to duplicate them. Now, plagiarism is only the push of a button away.

Speaking of "crazy," "The Talk" debuts on CBS today, featuring Sara Gilbert, Sharon Osbourne, Leah Remini, Julie Chen, Holly Robinson Peete, and Marissa Jaret Winokur in a show that's absolutely nothing like "The View." (We mention that it's also World Menopause Day - completely in passing ...)

While we've mentioned science, let's not forget art. In 1896, the world's first comic strip, "The Yellow Kid," debuted. It wasn't so much a "strip" as a daily cartoon featuring something outlandish in society that the otherwise-mute Kid would comment on with writing on his nighshirt. What he would have had to say about Henri Matisse's "Le Bateau," we can only imagine. It went on display at New York's Museum of Modern Art on this day in 1961 - and it wasn’t until 116, 000 viewers and 47 days had passed that someone noticed that the painting had been hanging upside down.

We finish by noting it's Alaska Day, commemorating the transfer of Alaska from Russia to the United States in 1867. (No jokes about seeing Russia from your house, please ...)

Tuesday:

Only two events of note today. One is the 1745 death of Jonathan Swift, the cleric, novelist, and satirist who gave us "Gulliver's Travels" (whence originated our corporate name) and "A Modest Proposal." One is tempted to hope he was eaten by cannibals, but, alas, he met his end via a stroke.

In 1945, Harris Glen Milstead was born in Baltimore. Glenn led an ordinary life until he met aspiring filmmaker John Waters, who cast him as "The Smoking Nun" in his film "Roman Candles," renaming him "Divine," the name he used the rest of his life. Divine was described by "People" magazine as the "Drag Queen of the Century" (though was there that much competition?) and spent the rest of his career going from one outlandish role to another in Waters' films before his untimely death at the age of 42.

Wednesday:

We have three seasonal events today that are absolutely appropriately for this time of year. In 1967, Roger Patterson and Robert Gimlin, took out their home-movie camera, photographed a guy in a gorilla suit, and claimed they’d filmed a Bigfoot. The veracity of the footage has been the subject of debate ever since, though we're prepared to say it's a fake.

In the otherwise-sleepy hamlet of Circleville, Ohio, the annual Circleville Pumpkin Show will begin its four-day run today. Since 1903, the festival has presented thousands of these flavorful squashes to an adoring public who come for the sculpting, bands, and beauty contests, but who stay for the World’s Largest Pumpkin Pie, baked fresh every year by Lindsey’s Bake Shop.

In 1882, Bela Blasko was born in Lugos, Romania. At 12, the stage-struck Bela dropped out of school, became an actor, and changed his last name to Lugosi. As Bela Lugosi, he was a matinee idol in his own country, before coming to America in 1921. He worked as a laborer and occasional actor until 1927, when his continental good looks and accent made him a natural for the title role in the Broadway production of “Dracula." While the play was a smash hit, and led to a Hollywood contract, his accent baffled casting directors, who could see him only as a romantic vampire, and he was soon type-cast in horror films. Despite some occasional “straight” roles (most notably in 1938’s "Ninotchka," his career quickly headed to not-very-good parts in B-pictures, usually parodying his image. He always gave his utmost, even when the material was sub-par, as in his final films with Ed Wood, Hollywood’s worst director. He died of a heart attack in 1956.

Thursday:

More unrelated (but still interesting) events for the day:

In 1849, the first tattooed man to be put on public exhibit, James F. O’Connel, was put on display at the Franklin Theatre in New York City. Not sure what more can be added to that.

Except perhaps noting that today is Reptile Awareness Day, so we encourage you to go out and be aware of some reptiles -- perhaps while enjoying a big plate of nachos, since it’s also the International Day of the Nacho.

Friday:

When we compile these lists, we’re overwhelmed with celebrations of "National This Day" and "International That Week," so imagine our surprise and disappointment when we discovered that one of our sources lists October 22 with this note: “There are no holiday events on record for this day,” Is it possible that only one day out of 365 is bereft of some kind of celebration? It may be true, though (alas!), as the only other events of note we could find are the 107th birthday of Stooge Jerome "Curly" Howard, and the fact that it’s International Stuttering Awareness Day.

Curly is probably the most popular of all the Stooges, combining a unique physical and vocal style into a characterization that was breathtakingly bold in the 1930s and has been a boon to adolescent boys (of all ages) in the decades since.

Saturday:

Looking for something fun to do today? We have three suggestions.

1) Celebrate the 80th anniversary of the world’s first miniature golf tournament in Chattanooga, Tennessee. The tournament was won by J.K. Scott, though the record neglects to state whether he was better shooting through the windmill or the castle.

2) If you’re near Oklahoma City, you might join the Ghouls Gone Wild celebration headlined by The Flaming Lips and participate in their annual March of 1000 Flaming Skeletons. Be warned, though, you’ve got to handle a live torch - and those costumes can be flammable.

3) You can celebrate Mole Day. The “Mole” is a method of counting the Avogadro number - 6.02 x 10 to the 23rd power of anything. Amodeo Avogadro discovered that the number of molecules in a mole is the same for all substances, which allows chemists are able to precisely measure quantities of chemicals in the lab. Mole Day is intended to help everyone become enthusiastic about chemistry. If you understood a word of that, the first two events may be too strenuous for you, so our advice is to stick with the chemistry.

Sunday:

To finish off the week, we’ll note the near-irony of it being the Feast of Good & Plenty, because yes, we had a number of good events this week, but not plenty of them.

It’s also World Origami Day, which somehow runs through November 11 (must be that those origami artists are able to fold time and space, as well as paper).

Speaking of folding, we also have to mention that, on this day in 1901, Annie Edson Taylor became the first person to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel. How she didn’t end up folded herself is one of the miracles of the age - especially considering she did it to celebrate her 63rd birthday. She’d sent her cat over the falls in her specially-padded barrel the day before, and when the feline emerged unscathed, she figured it was safe enough for her. Mrs. Taylor suffered a cut on her head, but was otherwise unharmed, though she did tell the press, "If it was with my dying breath, I would caution anyone against attempting the feat. I would sooner walk up to the mouth of a cannon, knowing it was going to blow me to pieces than make another trip over the Falls."

If all the above sounds like a lot of baloney, we merely note the appropriateness of today being National Bologna Day, and leave you make up your own mind.

See you next time!

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We Cannot Tell a Lie; It's the Best Spark Ever
By Dave Sikula
Mon, October 11, 2010, 12:01 am PDT

Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie as Jeeves and Bertie Wooster
"I say, Jeeves; this 'Spark' thing is a bit of
a rum go, isn't it?" "Actually, sir, I believe
it's a rather useful compendium of Internet
links." "Nonsense, Jeeves; there's nothing
useful on the Internet."
Now that it's officially autumn (in the Northern Hemisphere, anyway), events seem to be calming down as we prepare for the long winter hibernation. But don't think for a minute that nothing's going on. For example:

Monday:

In 1759, Mason Weems was born. Although he studied theology and became a parson in the Episcopal Church, we remember him best for his 1800 "History of the Life and Death, Virtues and Exploits of General George Washington." The book was less a biography than a collection of exaggerations and falsehoods -- most notably the story of six-year-old George cutting down one of his father's cherry trees,then confessing to the crime. The book was popular in its time, but has been debunked in the centuries since.

It's a day to celebrate politicians, such as the 126th birthday of Eleanor Roosevelt. Mrs. Roosevelt was the wife of Franklin D. Roosevelt, and the first lady of the land for some 12 years, During her time in the White House, she fought tirelessly for liberal causes and human rights, continuing her work after her husband's death, as both a United States delegate to the United Nations, and as chair of the U.N. Commission on Human Rights. Not that she couldn't have fun, or take time out to appear on quiz shows or to hawk margarine on television.

And it's the 35th wedding anniversary of Bill and Hillary Rodham Clinton. (Hint to Bill: the 35th is the coral or jade anniversary). Little did the Clintons know that their wedding night would coincide with the premiere of "Saturday Night Live," a program that would, in the decades to come, poke endless fun at both of them.

Remember last week when we were all aquiver over the Nobel Prizes being announced? Well, the festivities conclude today with the announcement of the winner of the Prize for Economics. Economics being an inexact science, this is the only one of the prizes not founded by Alfred Nobel, having been established by the Bank of Sweden in 1969.

What better way to celebrate winning a Nobel than by having a huge Thanksgiving feast? Think it's too early for Thanksgiving? Not if you're in Canada, where today is Turkey Day, thanks to their earlier harvests. And leftover turkey makes a great sandwich, perfect for National School Lunch Week, which begins today.

Finally, and more seriously, in light of the recent "It Gets Better" project, we note that today is National Coming Out Day, on which we celebrate our lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered friends and family members and their fight for equality. Sadly, tomorrow is the 12th anniversary the death of Matthew Shepard, who was tortured to death solely for being gay.

Tuesday:

Not so interested in equality was the Roman emperor Nero, who ascended to the throne on this day in 54. While Nero was, by all accounts, a tyrant and a dictator, he is likely best known for the apocryphal scenes of him fiddling or playing the lyre while Rome burned in a fire that destroyed a good portion of the city – a tale that's as false as the one about Washington and the cherry tree -- or the myths that Paul McCartney suffered a premature death.

The "Paul is Dead" craze began when a group of Drake University students uncovered a series of "clues" they thought had been planted by the Beatles to indicate McCartney had died. On this day in 1969, they persuaded WKNR DJ Russ Gibb to play "Revolution #9" backward in order to reveal its supposedly masked message of "Turn me on, dead man."

Some notable TV anniversaries today. Most important to us is the 1950 premiere of "The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show." While Burns and Allen were one of the top acts in vaudeville, movies, and radio, their television show was their most important contribution to show business. Decades ahead of its time, the show featured such innovations as George talking directly to the audience about the plot of the episode (which he generally found out about by watching the program -- as it was taking place -- on the television in his den, and replacing actors in mid-scene with other actors playing the same part. All of it was highlighted by Gracie's unique form of humor, which combined a lovable dimness with an inability to see beyond the literal meanings of words.

In 1953, "The Bob Hope Show" began its 20-year run on NBC, as America's favorite comedian traded quips and appeared in skits with the country’s top movie stars, athletes, and personalities.

1978 saw the premiere of "Sneak Previews," the first national iteration of the many shows featuring film critics Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert battling each other over which movies were any good. Those that were were awarded the coveted "two thumbs up" rating. Those that weren’t were usually greeted by Aroma the Educated Skunk or Spot the Wonder Dog, who highlighted the "stinker" or "dog" of the week.

We can assume that such a dismal fate would not await either the nominees for the Man Booker Prize, awarded each year to the best English-language novel written by a citizen of the British Commonwealth (the winner of which will be announced today), or those hoping for a National Book Award, the finalists for which will be announced tomorrow.

Those who are afraid they won’t get either a nomination or an award can take comfort in knowing that tomorrow is National Face Your Fears Day. Buck up and wait till next year!

You’d think a holiday would be anything but controversial, but today is Columbus Day (even if the banks were closed yesterday), and the "discoverer of America" is anything but universally hailed, especially by Native American groups.

Wednesday:

Only three events of note today, but none of them are without interest.

First of all, today is the 235th anniversary of the founding of the United States Navy.

It's also National Bring Your Teddy Bear to Work Day, in the hopes that having a stuffed friend nearby will relieve some of your workplace stress.

And speaking of stress, it was four years ago today that the Six Flags theme park in Gurnee, Illinois held a live cockroach eating contest. If only they'd waiting until the 14th, they could have made the competition part of National Chocolate Covered Insect Day or even National Dessert Day. Yum!

Thursday:

We mentioned that last week was the anniversary of the start of the carving of Mount Rushmore, and we have to wonder, given today's anniversary, whether Theodore Roosevelt could have done all the sculpting by himself, using only his bare hands. Why? On this date in 1912, while campaigning in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Roosevelt was shot at point blank range. Fortunately, a metal glasses case and the speech he was supposed to deliver was folded in his breast pocket and took most of the impact. Even with a fresh flesh wound and the bullet still in him, TR still delivered the speech. They don't make 'em like that anymore.

Speaking of unique individuals, today is the birthday of actress Lillian Gish. Born in 1893, Miss Gish began her film career in 1912, working with pioneering director D.W. Griffith, and kept working until 1987’s "The Whales of August." Her career spanned virtually the entire history of cinema. While it might seem impossible that one woman could have been in both 1915’s "The Birth of a Nation" and an episode of "The Love Boat" 65 years later, Miss Gish did it!

Miss Gish even did live TV (there was no other kind in the 1950s, after all), and NBC's "30 Rock" will revive that artform tonight, with a special live episode from Rockefeller Center’s Studio 8H, normally the home of "Saturday Night Live."

As unique as Theodore Roosevelt, Lillian Gish, and live television is "Winnie-the-Pooh," the children’s classic by A.A. Milne, first published on this day in 1926.

Friday:

Speaking of characters, we note quite a few of them today. For example, Grace Bedell,  the eleven-year-old girl who wrote Abraham Lincoln on this date in 1860, suggesting that he grow a beard because "all the ladies like whiskers and they would tease their husbands to vote for you and then you would be President." Whether or not Lincoln took the advice seriously, he did start growing a beard within a month and was indeed elected.

Then there's P.G. Wodehouse, born in 1881. Wodehouse wrote some of the funniest novels ever penned (many of which featured the hopelessly dim Bertie Wooster and his invaluable valet, Jeeves) and was also a talented songwriter, who worked with composer Jerome Kern to, more or less, create the American musical.

And let us not forget Jack the Ripper (there's a transition!), who in 1888, sent his letter "From Hell" to the police investigating his murders.

Speaking of death, superspy Mata Hari met hers on this day in 1917. Even though she had lured many a man to his doom during World War I, she met her own end before a firing squad.

Of course, the entire world nearly met its end in 1962, as the Cuban Missile Crisis began. The Soviet Union had deployed nuclear missiles in Cuba, only 90 miles from the Florida coast, and the whole world held its breath as U.S. President John F. Kennedy and Soviet Premier Nikita Khrushchev went toe-to-toe, daring each other to blink first. Khrushchev ultimately conceded, removing the missiles after two weeks.

But it's not all gloom and doom today (even if today is National Grouch Day and tomorrow is National Boss Day -- are they inseparable?). It’s the anniversary of the 1951 premiere of "I Love Lucy," the sitcom that soon became the nation's favorite program and has aired continually ever since, thanks in large part to star and producer Desi Arnaz. In the early days of television, comedies were either aired live and lost forever, or syndicated using a kinescope (that is, by placing a camera in front of a monitor and filming the live broadcast). Arnaz had the idea of filming the show with three cameras before a live audience, treating the whole thing as a small movie -- a technique used to this day.

Of today’s last two events, one is unnecessary and the other is most necessary. The unnecessary one is Global Handwashing Day, which has the goal of encouraging everyone to wash their hands using soap and water to prevent the spread of disease. We know all our readers wash their hands -- especially after using the bathroom -- so there’s no need for the notice, right?

The necessary event is National Mammography Day, on which all women over 40 -- and those at risk -- are urged to schedule a mammogram in the hopes of detecting any early signs of breast cancer.

Saturday and Sunday:

Saturday is Dictionary Day, dedicated to that book with all the answers -- or, at least, with all the definitions. Why? Because, in 1758, Noah Webster, the man whose name has become synonymous (adj., "Having the same or a similar meaning" or "equivalent in connotation") with the idea of defining words, was born.

It’s also the birthday of two of the greatest playwrights in world history -- though they couldn't have been more different. 1854 saw the birth of Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde. Wilde wrote with a flamboyance and genius that has seldom been equaled. His plays, such as "The Importance of Being Earnest" and "Lady Windermere’s Fan," bristle with wit. Unfortunately, his homosexuality was anathema to Victorian English society, and he was sentenced to two years at hard labor, which broke both his body and his spirit. He died in exile in Paris in 1900.

In 1888, Eugene O’Neill was born. The son of one of America's finest actors, James O’Neill, Eugene was drawn to the theatre from his youth. After stints as a merchant seaman and in a tuberculosis sanatorium, he began writing plays that were generally experimental, theatrical, and tragic. His final plays, including "A Moon for the Misbegotten" and "The Iceman Cometh," are towering achievements, but both are surpassed by "Long Day’s Journey into Night," a portrait of his family that is simultaneously horrific, lacerating, forgiving, tragic, and comedic. He was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1936, and died in 1953.

Actress Angela Lansbury turns 85 today. Lansbury began her film career at the age of 17 and hasn't stopped working since. While most audiences know her as mystery novelist Jessica Fletcher on "Murder, She Wrote," she is widely considered to be the first lady of the American stage, whose work in such musicals as "Mame" and "Sweeney Todd" have earned her seven Tony Award nominations and five awards, not to mention multiple nominations for the Academy Awards (three), the Golden Globes (15), and the Emmys (18).

No doubt our good friends at the Ultimate Fighting Championship will note Miss Lansbury's birthday with tonight's UFC 120 in London, as will the folks who urge you to protect and improve the lives of cats around the country on National Feral Cat Day.

If you'd like to raise your own glass to her, we urge you to cook up a mess of noodles to accompany it, since tomorrow is National Pasta Day. If you don't have the urge to cook, you might want to pass on a quick burger and join others who are noting World Anti-McDonald’s Day. We'd never do that, personally -- the fries are just too darn good -- but we appreciate the sentiment.

However you celebrate, don't overdo it, or you won't be able to join us next time. See you then!

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Directory categories: American History, Urban Legends, Television History, Vaudeville, Phobias
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