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Here's To the Winners
By Dave Sikula
Thu, December 9, 2010, 12:01 am PST

The Milestone Mo-Tel today
The Milestone Mo-Tel today. Winners get one
free night. Losers get two. (That's the second
time we've used that joke today.)
If the whole world loves a winner, we have a weekend full of love ahead of us. Let's get started!

The most obvious winners will be declared Thursday when either Clint Robertson or Brandy Kuentzel wins the right to become Donald Trump's latest Apprentice for one year. (We hope that the loser isn't stuck for two years ...) One of the three remaining teams on "The Amazing Race" will win a million smackers on Sunday. (Perhaps eating that sheep's head may have been worth it.) It's almost guaranteed that none of these winners will make Barbara Walters' list of the year's "Most Fascinating People," (most fascinating to her, anyway ...) but we’ll find out for sure Thursday. (Our guess for #1 on her list? The cameraman who smears the Vaseline all over the lens that photographs her.) And on Friday, they'll be handing out the Nobel Prizes. The Nobels aren't like the Oscars; everyone already knows who won and the winners have actually accomplished something that matters, rather than playing loveable oddballs.

Saturday we'll see some sports winners. In the afternoon, someone (Cam Newton? Andrew Luck? LaMichael James?) will win the Heisman Trophy as the nation's finest college football player, and in the evening, either Georges St-Pierre or Josh Koscheck will take the welterweight championship at UFC 124 in Montreal. We assume the combatants will not resort to wheeling around the ring in roller skates, but while it would be appropriate (given that Thursday marks the anniversary of their 1884 patent), we'd have to warn them that such a thing would be just plain dangerous.)

Sunday also marks the 10th anniversary of the U.S. Supreme Court's ruling in Bush v. Gore, which ensured that George W. Bush became the nation's 43rd president. Whether that made the country a winner or a loser, we'll leave up to you. Falling into a similar category is Larry King's retirement from his CNN talk show on Friday. (As with President Bush, we won't say whether that's a plus or a minus.)

Weary travelers were winners 85 years ago Sunday, when the Milestone Mo-Tel, the world's first motel (short for "motor hotel"), opened in San Luis Obispo, California.

If we stretch the definition of "winner" to include those whose birthdays fall this weekend, then we're lousy with winners. For example, Thursday sees the birthdays of both Margaret Hamilton (1902) and Redd Foxx (1922). Hamilton is best known for her role as the Wicked Witch of the West in the 1939 classic, "The Wizard of Oz." Despite her indelible portrayal of one of the screen's great villains, Hamilton loved children and was a lifelong advocate for charities that benefitted kids and animals. Foxx was someone whose work, on the other hand, was decidedly not for kids. A veteran of the black vaudeville entertainment venues known as the "Chitlin' Circuit," Foxx recorded a series of "party records" in the 1950s that were both filthy and hilarious. He reached a mainstream fame in the '70s when he starred in "Sanford and Son," where his frequent feigned heart attacks were one of the show's running gags. In a supreme irony, he suffered an actual heart attack while rehearsing for another television show, but no one believed was it real until it was too late.

Sunday would have been the 95th birthday of Frank Sinatra. The greatest popular singer of the 20th century, Sinatra was also an Oscar-winning actor, starred in numerous TV specials that consisted of nothing but him singing with his guests, and was the biggest attraction in Las Vegas when that title actually meant something.

Monday, we celebrate the 192nd birthday of Mary Todd Lincoln, wife of Abraham Lincoln who was criticized in her time for her extravagant and spendthrift ways, and committed to a psychiatric hospital by her son Robert. While she was undoubtedly depressed, wouldn't any woman who’d lived through the death of three sons and the murder of her husband (while sitting next to him) feel the same? She was eventually declared competent and released, but her health was broken, and she died three years later.

If birthday celebrants are winners, so too are those is show business who meet success, like performers and lovers of country music, who can celebrate the 83rd anniversary of the first broadcast of the Grand Ole Opry on Friday. The Opry has been a staple of radio and television in the decades since it debuted, highlighting the best in country, from Hank Williams and Minnie Pearl to Clint Black and Carrie Underwood. Someone who's appeared at the Opry (but has yet to be inducted into its member ranks) is Taylor Swift. Perhaps the Opry has been waiting for her to turn 21 - in which case, it need wait no longer! The Grammy-winning singer reaches her majority on Monday.

Thursday will see the annual airing of the Rankin-Bass animated Christmas special, "The Year without a Santa Claus," which features memorable turns by Snow Miser and Heat Miser (who are also not members of the Opry).

Friday is also the 55th anniversary of the "Mighty Mouse Playhouse's" television premiere. In TV's early days, broadcasters were desperate for material to air, so old movies and cartoons were natural fodder, and Paul Terry's "Mighty Mouse" cartoons were some of the oddest programs to come to the screen. Mini operatic melodramas, they featured the eponymous rodent singing his was through battles with the villainous Oil Can Harry. Mighty made a brief comeback in the 80s in a brilliant TV series produced by Ralph Bakshi, but he's been in retirement since self-appointed censor Donald Wildmon mistook the mouse's flower sniffing for drug use. (No, really.) Wildmon isn't the only well-intentioned, if-misguided, protector we mention, though, since Thursday is the anniversary of the founding of the John Birch Society, which has been protecting Americans from the Communists lurking under their beds for 52 years.

Legitimate do-gooders have something to celebrate this weekend, too. Thursday is the U.N's annual International Anti-Corruption Day, dedicated to wiping out, well, corruption and promoting the rule of law, and Friday is both Human Rights Day and the beginning of Human Rights Week.

We end by noting a delightful juxtaposition on Thursday. December 9, 1792, saw the first cremation in America, when statesman Henry Laurens died at his plantation in Charleston, South Carolina, and per his will, his body was burned. On the same date in 1886, Clarence Birdseye, inventor of frozen food was born. We're reminded of the choice Curly Howard was given in a Three Stooges short: to be burned at the stake or to have his head cut off. He opted for the former, on the reasoning that a hot stake's better than a cold chop. Good night!

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"Either These Curtains Go or I Do"
By Dave Sikula
Tue, November 30, 2010, 12:01 am PST

Oscar Wilde in 1882
All right; so those weren't
Oscar Wilde's last words - but
they should have been
We'll start the day by mentioning three of the wittiest men who ever lived. It's the birthday of both Jonathan Swift (b. 1667) and Mark Twain (b. 1835), and the anniversary of the death in 1900 of Oscar Wilde. Swift was the Irish cleric and satirist who wrote "A Modest Proposal" (which purportedly advocated that the cure for Irish economic woes was selling its children to be eaten) and "Gulliver's Travels" (which started out as a satire of European politics, but has evolved to become fodder for Jack Black to show once again how annoyingly unfunny he is). We've written about Twain in previous Sparks, but we’ll add once again that his "Adventures of Huckleberry Finn" is considered by many to be the "Great American Novel," and that his autobiography was published a couple of weeks ago. Oscar Fingal O'Flahertie Wills Wilde was one of Ireland and England's most celebrated wits, with an epigram for every occasion. He wrote plays, books, and poems, including one of the most perfect comedies ever, "The Importance of Being Earnest." In 1895, at the height of his fame, he was arrested and tried for his homosexuality, and eventually sentenced to two years of hard labor. A broken man by the time he was released in 1897, he left London, ending his days in a  shabby Parisian hotel.

On a less gloomy Gallic note, we note that on this day in 1886, the Folies Bergère staged its first revue. The theatre was dedicated to music hall and vaudeville-type performances, and in its time has featured such stars as Charlie Chaplin, W.C. Fields, Elton John, Ella Fitzgerald, Frank Sinatra, and even Benny Hill. If you're looking for racier entertainment, we can point you to a double shot today, as CBS will air the annual "Victoria's Secret Fashion Show," and the 2011 Pirelli calendar will be released. The TV show, a parade of beautiful women walking the runway in their underwear is a beloved holiday tradition for men (and lingerie-loving women) everywhere, while the Pirelli calendar offers many of the same models, only sans the underwear, in artistic photos. (We'd offer more links to the calendar, but this is a family-friendly blog, after all.)

We're so family-friendly, that we'll offer some programming to counter the fashion show. Tonight also brings the annual airing of the stop-motion animated classic, "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" and NBC's special "Christmas in Rockefeller Center," which will feature appearances by Susan Boyle, Mariah Carey, Sheryl Crow, Jackie Evancho, Josh Groban, Annie Lennox, Kylie Minogue, and Jessica Simpson The extravaganza will climax with the lighting of the Center's tree (this year, it's a 74-foot Norway spruce from Mahopac, New York).

The weather forecast for New York on Tuesday evening calls for rain and a low of 53°F, not exactly winter weather, so we guess it's appropriate that the U.N.'s Climate Change Conference is being held this week in sunny Cancun, Mexico (Tuesday's forecast high: 82°F). Speaking of "hot," Tuesday is the 28th anniversary of the release of Michael Jackson's "Thriller," which became the biggest-selling album of all time, in addition to inspiring prisoners around the globe to replicate Jacko's signature moves.

As unique as Michael Jackson in their own ways were Winston Churchill and Irma S. Rombauer. Churchill was the Nobel Prize-winning author, historian, orator, and two-time British Prime Minister who led his country through World War II (and was promptly bounced out of office afterward as thanks) and whose 136th birthday occurs today. Rombauer was the St. Louis teacher and housewife whose cooking classes were so popular that, on this day in 1931, she self-published her book of recipes under the title "The Joy of Cooking." The book has never been out of print, and although it has undergone numerous revisions and alterations in the decades since, it remains one of America's favorite cookbooks.

Finally, we remind you that today is Computer Security Day, so take a moment to check your security settings and virus updates, won't you? We want to see you back safely next time.

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We'll Always Have "Casablanca"
By Dave Sikula
Fri, November 26, 2010, 12:01 am PST

Humphey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman in
"Here's looking at you, kid."
On this weekend dedicated to two favorite American pastimes - shopping and food - we ask you to take a moment to think of Sylvan N. Goldman, as Saturday will mark the 26th anniversary of his death. Mr. Goldman was a major stockholder of the Piggly-Wiggly supermarket chain and invented the shopping cart. For various reasons, his customers didn't want to use the carts, so his solution was to hire fake shoppers to wheel them around the stores to show others how useful they could be. Obviously, it worked.

The excitement of Thanksgiving has now passed, and while history tells us that Yahoo! will see search spikes today on both food poisoning and the location of your nearest pizza parlor, many of us will concentrate on the primary events of this season: shopping and not shopping. As consumers head to the disorienting wonderland that is the mall (and we note that Friday is the 145th anniversary of the publication of Lewis Carroll's "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"), both of these pastimes will make big headlines in the media.

For those who are pro-shopping, today is "Black Friday," the day of the year that sees the highest number of sales transactions. Let it be noted, however, that the day the most money changes hands is the Saturday before Christmas (though with Christmas falling on a Saturday this year, it’s anyone’s guess what the biggest day that will actually be). Monday is, of course, "Cyber Monday," when workers will waste a good portion of the day shopping online, rather than doing actual work (like writing The Spark).

On the other hand, Friday is also "Buy Nothing" Day, which reminds us all to not feed the corporate beast that drives this holiday frenzy and to concentrate on either the message of the season or home-made gifts. Consider a cake (since it's also National Cake Day), or even donuts to commemorate the 2002 passing of Verne H. Winchell, who founded the Winchell's Donuts chain in 1948, and was known as "The Donut King." Whatever you eat, be sure to brush afterwards - and celebrate Friday's National Flossing Day.

Someone who’s probably doing all he can to ignore this weekend is Eldrick "Tiger" Woods, since Saturday marks the one-year anniversary of the car crash that sent his whole word spiraling. Perhaps he can use the occasion to get his aura read and see his future. Fortunately for him, Sunday is International Aura Awareness Day. Failing that, he may want to head to New York for the first preview of "Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark." The musical, with a score by Bono and The Edge, has been plagued by budget problems (its estimated cost is $65 million, nearly four times the usual for a big Broadway show) and severe injuries to cast members. "Break a leg!" might not be the best thing to wish this particular cast, but their misfortunes so far might make Tiger feel better.

A number of birthdays fall on this weekend. Saturday sees what would have been the 88th birthday of cartoonist and "Peanuts" creator Charles M. Schulz (who died in 2000 the night before his final strip ran), as well as the 67th "birthday" of the Slinky. The flexible toy was invented by engineer Richard James in 1943, and its initial lot of 400 units sold out in a mere 90 minutes. Despite its limited uses (just how many staircases can it walk down?), the Slinky has remained a perennial toyland favorite.

Saturday would have been the 70th birthday of martial arts superstar Bruce Lee. It's also the 100th anniversary of New York's Pennsylvania Station. Penn Station was a grand and imposing structure that welcomed millions of visitors and immigrants to Manhattan in the days when train travel was king. In 1963, despite a vigorous campaign to save it, the station was torn down to make room for the fourth Madison Square Garden, a mistake many in the city have rued in the decades since.

Monday sees the birthday of movie choreographer supreme Busby Berkeley (1895), and Sunday brings us a trifecta of masters of their craft: "Daily Show" host Jon Stewart turns 48; Randy Newman, the Academy Award-winning composer (and writer of the greatest song ever written about Los Angeles), turns 67 (he's as old as the Slinky!); and Paul Shaffer, David Letterman's longtime bandleader, who's personally played with pretty much every major rock performer of the century, and whose group is the house band for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony turns 61.

For us, though, the most significant anniversary of the weekend is the November 26, 1942 opening of "Casablanca" at New York's Hollywood Theatre. Still considered one of the greatest films ever made, "Casablanca's" mixture of heroism, humor, and self-sacrifice, combined with indelible characters and lines has never been equaled in the many years since. They truly don't make 'em like that anymore.

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"Ceci N'est Pas une Pipe" ... It's a Spark
By Dave Sikula
Fri, November 19, 2010, 12:01 am PST

Rene Magritte's
This may not be a pipe, but it
is the illustration for a Spark
Two events earlier this week couldn't help but remind us of their historical precedents. First, the engagement of Prince William and Kate Middleton made us remember that Friday is the 63rd wedding anniversary of his grandparents, Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip. If you were thinking of sending Liz and Phil a present, it's probably not necessary; they're managing to squeeze by, even in this tight economy.

Tuesday's groundbreaking for the George W. Bush Presidential Center at Southern Methodist University in Dallas made us think of November 19, 1939, when Franklin D. Roosevelt laid the cornerstone for the FDR Library and Museum in Hyde Park, New York, on the grounds of the Roosevelt family estate. It was America's first official presidential library. Until then, executive papers were either distributed to the President's families, given to the National Archives, or tossed away. The result was a mess that plagued historians. For example, there are numerous drafts and handwritten copies of Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address, all of which differ slightly, so that today it's unclear exactly what he said on November 19, 1863, when he delivered the speech to mixed reviews. Democratic newspapers panned it as "silly, flat, and dishwatery," and Republican papers called it "tasteful and elegant." You pays yer money and you takes yer choice, we guess. (Good thing there isn't that kind of partisanship today ...)

Speaking of "paying yer money," we're guessing that more than a few people will be doing just that at the movies this weekend, as the first part of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" opens. We don't know if folks will be lining up for that, or to see the trailer for next summer's Green Lantern" movie, but we're willing to bet that there'll be some who are more interested in space opera than in teenage wizards.

"Green Lantern" is a movie about an interstellar police force. We don't know if their home planet of Oa (or even Mogo, the Green Lantern who is a sentient planet) would be visible using the Hubble Space Telescope, but we do know that Saturday would have been the 121st birthday of Edwin Hubble, the astronomer for whom the telescope is named, and is the 26th anniversary of the founding of the SETI Institute, which searches for extraterrestrial life.

Whether there's anyone else out there is a mystery that SETI is dedicated to solving, but that riddle pales in comparison to the one that gripped America over the summer and fall of 1980, when the country wondered who shot J.R. Ewing. Sunday is the 30th anniversary of the episode of "Dallas" that solved that mystery. It was estimated that 83 million people were tuned in that night, which is still the third-largest TV audience ever. Appropriately, Sunday is also World Television Day, dedicated to the boob tube and all its splendors. (It's also World Hello Day, during which you're supposed to say "Hello" to ten people. But if you're watching television, you probably won't get the chance. Of course, if you've spent Saturday night watching UFC 123 from Auburn Hills, Michigan, and Sunday afternoon watching the NASCAR Ford 400 from the Miami Homestead Speedway, you may be ready to get off the couch and socialize.

Crazed from too much TV? You might try sending birthday greetings to Belgian artist René Magritte. He was born on November 21, 1889, and died in 1967, but his art is so surreal - with trains rushing from fireplaces and apples replacing human heads - that he might appreciate the good wishes anyway. If you're still desperate to make a human connection, you can wish a happy 45th to Bjork, the surrealist Icelandic singer and swan fancier.

We close with week with two holidays: Sunday is Universal Children's Day, created by the United Nations in 1954 to encourage work that benefits and promotes the welfare of the children of the world, and Friday is World Toilet Day, which sounds funny, but promotes clean and sanitary conditions for everyone, child and adult. We are reminded on this day that a straight flush beats a full house.

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Turn Out the Lights, the Party's Over
By Dave Sikula
Tue, November 9, 2010, 12:01 am PST

Hedy Lamarr
"That's "Hedy," not "Hedley!"
Tuesday:

As mysterious as Dorothy Kilgallen's death on November 8, 1965, is the 1965 blackout that overtook much of the Northeast United States and Ontario, Canada on this day. While the official cause was a series of mistakes and blown relays, there were also reports of UFOs near some of the power stations. We don't necessarily believe the reports; we're just saying ... Not all of the Northeast was affected, however, and a full moon that night kept things surprisingly safe, with New York City reporting only five instances of looting.

When one speaks of New York, it's difficult to not think of Stanford White (whose 157th birthday falls on this day). White's distinctive architectural fingerprints can still be found all over Manhattan more than a century after his death. Such structures as the Municipal Building, the Washington Square Arch, and the Metropolitan Museum of Art – not to mention many of the millionaires' mansions on Fifth Avenue - were his designs.

While White's firm designed things to be built, it's a demolished object that we take special notice of today, as it's the 21st anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. The wall itself was the literal dividing line between East and West Berlin, constructed to keep East Germans from escaping the Communist regime. When that government fell, so did the wall.

Something that irriatated those killjoy East German officials was rock music, and on this day in 1967, the first issue of "Rolling Stone" was published. While "Rolling Stone" was originally dedicated to rock, pop, and blues music and musicians – and those are still its primary focus – it's expanded in the decades since to become one of America's most respected magazines, known for its reporting on politics and entertainment.

Speaking of respect, we throw a little of it to the creative community today as it's Inventor's Day, celebrated today because it's the birthday of actress Hedy Lamarr. Lamarr was not only one of the most glamorous and beautiful actresses of the 1930s and '40s, but was also something of a scientific genius. In 1942, she was granted a patent for a communication system that would "hop" frequencies in order to make radio-guided torpedoes harder to detect. While the technology went basically unused until the '60s, today it forms the basis for wi-fi networks and cell phones.

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